Unorthodox: Tree-Chan
by MapleTreesAbove
Summary: Person A: Dies. Is reborn as a Konoha Ninja. Becomes friends with everyone. Changes plot. Beats up bad guys. Falls in love. Happily ever after. -Person B: Doesn't die. Is reborn into Konoha anyway. Doesn't become a ninja. Ends up being a jungle gym and sanctuary for Naruto. Screams "Why the hell am I a tree?" but only the shrubs can hear her. OC self-insert
1. Shrubs Don't Explain Anything

Oddly unusual days usually start in oddly unusual ways. But that's not always true.

If she had to guess that morning, Katie would have said that nothing out of the ordinary would happen on that particular day. Even when the stray thought of her doing something incredibly embarrassing at that job interview she had later that day, lurked around the darkest corners of her mind like a hungry vulture.

To say that her prediction was accurate would be an understatement.

First thing she did that morning was wake up to the beautiful sound of heavy metal music, courtesy of Katie's outdated smartphone that sat innocently on the night table. Needless to say, Katie was two seconds away from throwing the phone out of the window.

She did that once.

A businessman in his squeaky clean suit and tie got hit in the head, despite the astronomical odds. The morning was filled with curses, an egg breakfast sandwich, and threats of bringing the issue to court.

Fun right?

Getting ready for the day always left Katie in a zombie like trance. With a combined force of grogginess, and a general dislike of mornings, it was difficult to remember the details from the sleepy haze that covered Katie's eyes as she went about her business.

That didn't mean that Katie wasn't wide awake by the time she had her hand on the door knob, ready to leave the safety of her beautiful tiny home.

No matter what day it was, she always had to make sure to avoid the Reed's residence. There was this pesky kid, Taylor Reed, who would constantly throw shoes at Katie. Everything from baby boots to high heels, It didn't matter. It usually ended up in Katie's hair.

Don't ask her why, the brat had a one-track mind when it came to antagonizing her.

It wasn't like his parents were any better. The brat's mom always gave out unnecessary comments about how Katie wasn't 'lady like', and the dad was still pissed about this incident involving his truck, a can of tuna, and a flamethrower... But why would anyone want to hear _that_ story?

After stealthily walking down three flights of stairs (The Reeds lived right next to the elevator and there was no way Katie was going to use it for obvious reasons.) she would then hop on over to the nearest coffee shop.

Five blocks down the street, take a left, walk (or run) three more blocks, then the coffee shop was on the corner of Wheeler Street.

As a rule, Katie tried to avoid drinking coffee. But she might actually be able to get this job, and then weeks of searching for a decent living would be over! And more importantly, no more working at McDonalds for a minimum wage.

It's a hopeless dream, but a dream nonetheless. And that little cup of Chai Tea Latte was going to help Katie achieve it. You know, eventually. In the long run.

As soon as she payed the exhausted cashier an ungodly amount of money that she really shouldn't have been spending at a time like that, Katie casually walked out of the cafe.

Then she realized that she only had ten minutes to make it to the interview.

Crab-Nuggets.

Katie wondered offhandedly how she must have looked to those passing by her in a swirl of colours. Probably like some crazy person from some cheesy chick flick who was always running late to everything.

The running late part was true, but there was absolutely no way that she would just 'trip' over thin air and then land in the arms of a hot guy.

The one time she tried it, she ended up breaking her leg when she fell down the that huge flight of stairs when the dude casually stepped to the side without even looking up from his phone.

Ten minutes of some of the most intensive running she had ever done, Katie had arrived at the huge office building where her interview was to take place on the eleventh floor.

Panting and out of breath, Katie straightened herself out and chucked the now empty cup into a nearby trash can. From there, she took a deep breath and headed in.

Tragedy struck when Katie was only a few measly steps away from the door that lead to her potential employer's office.

She didn't know why, nor did she know how, but for some odd reason she felt her whole body sizes up right then and there. Instead of opening the door in a sophisticated way in order to make a good impression, her hands shot upward with her palms flat and fingers spread out. Her legs suddenly snapped together at the same time.

"Miss. Whitefield? Is there something the matter?" The soft spoken secretary who had taken upon herself to escort Katie directly to the head boss's office, asked in confusion. Katie tried to yank her hands down, but ultimately failed. They wouldn't budge from their I-will-give-you-a-giant-bear-hug-whether-you-like-it-or-not pose.

"Uh... give me a sec." Katie mumbled, fully aware that she was gaining unwanted attention from various people in various cubicles that dotted the office space. She tried to regain control of her body in a fresh wave of embarrassed panic. Katie wiggled, kicked, squirmed, and attempted to do the tango, but nothing she did even broke the stance that she was in.

Isn't that wonderful? Stuck in a stupid yoga pose in the middle of an office filled with overly-serious people who probably won't be co-workers any time in the near future.

Katie would have widened her eye, you know if she could even move her eyelids, when the door in front of her swung wide open.

"Whitefield," A bald man with a rather annoyed expression on his face appeared in the doorway. Great, now Katie was embarrassing herself in front of her interviewer.

"Uh-huh." She muttered in reply. Katie would have probably gone of an talked the man's ears off with excuses and apologies like she would any other time, but since she couldn't move her mouth from its partly open position no matter how hard she struggled, mumbled replies was all she could manage.

"Would you care to explain to everyone what you're doing right now?" He asked as he leaned against the doorframe, and crossed his arms. The man also tilted his head up so it would look like he was staring down at Katie despite being the same height.

Katie tried one last time to move her body to see if her dignity was even salvageable anymore. She failed. Again. And failure to move her body to her own will caused her to let out what sounded like and annoyed cat noise.

"Have no excuse... Stupidhead limbs are stupid" She finally spit out through clenched teeth. Though, it sounded more like a whole bunch of gibberish.

And that was all the prompting the man needed before he launched into an overbearing lecture on proper etiquette.

Naturally, Katie tuned him out. If she wanted to be lectured on how she was supposed to act, then she would break into the Reed's place and set herself up in their kitchen with a bowl of ramen, and listen to Mrs. Reed screech on like a baby harpy.

That was probably why Katie didn't notice everything start to disappear. The changes around her were subtle. It was like a giant invisible hand started tearing off pieces of reality. First the boring, grey cubicles went, then the office space, then the faces around here were gently ripped away.

She didn't even realize that everything around her was slowly turning white until her interviewer's face suddenly start to fade out of existence. All Katie could do was stand there with her feet pointing in opposite directions and her arms up high as the human before her was blown away, as if he was made of dust.

Katie attempted yet again to move, or at least to move her eyes.

Nothing.

Calm.

Silence.

Katie blinked.

She was screwed beyond belief.

This realization caused a fountain of yummy cusses to pour out of the twenty-four year old woman's mouth. And an epic battle for control over her body ensued, with Katie being even more desperate than before. Needless to say, Katie lost just like every other time that.

It might have been a few minutes, or a few days, or even a whole year before Katie stopped struggling. And it took even longer for the panic that came with realizing that she was floating in a pure white wasteland, and the adrenaline to subside.

Then the fear of the unknown settled in.

Humans were funny that way. They weren't afraid to go to leave the plant and land on a foreign celestial body, but they were afraid that the new neighbors from another country would infect the other wise perfect neighborhood with their strange ways.

Katie was generalizing here, but it was hard to think of a good comparison when every fiber of her very being was busy buzzing with terror.

There was no up, there was no down, nor was there a right, or a left. There was just white, white, white, white, _white, white white whitewhitewhitewhite_. What the hell was going on? Why was this happening? Was this a glitch in the matrix? Was some otherworldly creature doing this to her for its own sick entertainment?

If so, Katie hoped that the creature would step on a Lego. Bare foot.

See if it likes that.

Katie wasn't even sure that she still had her body.

Of course she could feel the strain as she tried to move her useless limbs, but it wasn't like she could look down, or up, or anywhere for that matter to confirm that all of her body parts were in place.

Katie felt a cold snake slither up to her heart and start squeeze the life out of it.

She was horrified, terrified, scared, you name it. One second she was living out what was possibly one of the most embarrassing and not to mention costly moments of her life, and then the next she couldn't move and was completely surrounded in by that stupidly stupid blank colour.

If she could, Katie would have give off a loud scream of defeat. But unfortunately, it seemed as though all functions of her voice box had ceased to work.

So now all Katie could do was wait until something changed.

Turns out that being stuck floating in a never ending abyss of whiteness while in a weird yoga pose (that is, if she still had a physical form at that point) was boring. Literally, nothing to do but sing the alphabet in really bad accents in order to pass the time. In her head of course.

Katie was right in the middle of singing twinkle twinkle little star in her head, with an awful Swedish accent when she felt something touch her foot.

She screamed like the devil was after her. At least tried to, but the heavy inhales and exhales got the point across pretty well.

Oh what Katie would give in order to simple look down to see what the holy fudge cakes was on her but she couldn't because some stupid deity decided that it was too much trouble to allow her to even move her head. Well, she assumed that it was some deity that was screwing things over since more than one law of logic and reality had been thoroughly broken.

And then suddenly, sparkles and a whole lot of rainbows.

No, Katy lied.

There was just a torrential down pour of something brown. (Probably dirt... At least she hoped that was dirt. It would haut Katie till her dying breath if it wasn't.)

Finally, after what seemed like a life time, Katie was able to just barely make out vague outlines. It started out small, but black, paper thin lines began appearing in Katie's line of vision.

The sight of something other than that dastardly colour made her spirits soar to new heights. And it didn't stop there.

Water coloured like splatters began taking shape, started filling in the shapes that the various lines had created.

It was like watching someone paint a beautiful scene from a romance novel. Tall trees towered under the pale blue skies. Clouds making abstract shapes as a gentle wind blew them about. Vibrant green leaves that made little roaring noises when they rustled. It was calm, it was peaceful.

It was enough to make salty balls of liquid roll down her metaphysical cheeks in shear joy.

Then Katie realized that she was tiny. Seriously tiny, like that green stuff that was around her must have been at least the size of a bus.

" _Small ones, small ones. The sprouts are popping out."_

" _Look at them go! They're doing it!"_

" _They can't reach the sun."_

" _Of course they can't they're too small."_

" _Our own leaves shelter them from danger, and yet they also shelter them from the food."_

" _Feed them."_

" _Food food food for everyone!"_

Unintelligent mumbles became more and more clear until Katie could somewhat understand the conversations that were going on around her.

Before she could even clear her head of the sudden haze that had settled on her mind, she felt a rush of... something. Power maybe? Something akin to adrenaline shooting through her veins, but not quite. Either way, it gave her strength that she never thought she would have. Katie felt like she could run for miles.

" _Look at them, they're all so cute!"_

" _A pity most of them won't survive."_

" _Don't be so pessimistic."_

" _I've been here for hundreds of years, I can be as pessimistic as I want to."_

" _Oh! Over here! This one's leaves are just starting to bud!"_

Still high off of the sudden energy that had poured through her, Katie struggled to understand just what the whispers were saying. And then, like a bullet train, it hit her.

To be quite honest, the impact of such a rash and unbelievable idea surfacing in her mind actually cause a dull headache to consume her mind.

Katie desperately searched around, in an attempt to dispel her growing theory as to what was going on.

That green stuff in front of her wasn't just ordinary green stuff, they were blades of grass. Those giant black things that were the size of cars? Beatles. The humongous brown creature the size of the empire state building? A squirrel.

With all of this information made possible to her, the theory, despite being absolutely ridiculous, seemed more plausible. Katie didn't know why this idea had suddenly been thrown upon her overactive imagination, but it was. Frustration and hopelessness bubbled up inside her until she couldn't take it anymore.

"Why the hell am I a tree?!" She yelled into the never ending sky. The whispers around her were abruptly silenced. The only thing Katie could hear was the wind gently breezing by the area. And then:

" _Oooh ho ho! This hasn't happened in years!"_ One of the whispers cackled in sadistic glee. " _Let the fun begin."_

 **Author's Note:**

Edit 8/31/15: I found some spelling mistakes, so I fixed those.

 **I shouldn't be starting a new story. I really shouldn't. But this idea wouldn't leave me alone, and after reading my fair share of well written self-inserts, I couldn't help it.**

 **The end result is a start of a long series of stories that I'm going to call 'Unorthodox'. It's basically going to be a bunch of Naruto OC self-inserts but with outright strange twists that no one else has explored.**

 **... At least I think no one has.**

 **I don't think that anyone has written a self-insert where the main character gets turned into a tree in Konoha. There isn't any particular direction this is going to take, and the chapters are going to be more like snapshots, but I hope you enjoy it.**

 **P.S. Sorry if there are any grammar errors, spelling errors, or general plot holes. I have no beta to check it over.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Never have, never will.**


	2. Trees and Fireballs of Death

Katie couldn't even believe she was about to say this but, being a tree sapling...was actually pretty interesting.

There, she did it.

Katie admitted that her short life of almost forty nine years as a tree was more interesting than her even shorter life of twenty four as a genuine homosapien.

It was all Chai's fault. (Chai. As in Chai tea latte, or simply tea tea latte if you would prefer...The not-coffee beverage she got that fateful day had come back to haunt her. It was a very scary coincidence.)

Katie completely believed that this new life of hers was going to be an agonizing, time consuming, boring, and just generally hellish all around. But no. Chai the maple tree, had to butt in and make the reincarnated-into-a-tree-despite-not-dieing experience something to look forward to.

You wouldn't think that being immobilized in the same spot for decades on end would be fun right? Wrong. The Root Network could keep a simple minded human like her entertained for thousands of years.

And no, Katie wasn't joking one itty bitty bit.

Although the name 'Root Network' did remind Katie strongly of the top secret division of ANBU from that anime Naruto that she used to watch so long ago. But really, the only thing in common that those two have is that the word 'Root' is somewhere in the name.

But clearly, Katie was being distracted once more by bright and shiny things that are not entirely important to the plot.

Anyway, Chai (Katie still couldn't get over that coincidence), introduced Katie to that wonderful communication line between every single plant in the forest.

The great and almighty Rootwork was kind of like a plant version of internet. Once a plant's roots grow long enough, they can connect their roots to another plant, and eventually, the whole forest of shrubs and trees have a way of communication.

It was really quite amazing. Plants had the equivalent of the internet thousands of years before it was even invented by humans.

Katie would have never guessed how much of a gossip fern bushes were, and ivy vines were a riot on comedy night. Not to mention grass can certainly spin a breathtaking story on any day.

There was never a dull moment when connected with the rest of the forest.

Sometimes, a plant went out of it's way to learn how to speak different languages used by the woodland creatures.

There was this one blueberry bush several kilometers away from Katie that recently learned how to speak Ant, (do not ask how that was accomplished. Katie was still trying to wrap her metaphysical brain around it.)

The blueberry bush -whose name was Midnight- made friends with a couple of colonies in the surrounding area and now the plants in the forest would occasionally hear news from those cute little insects.

Trees, bushes, and shrubs were actually quite accepting of other animals cultures, and as a result, there was always something interesting to learn about other animals.

But for some odd reason, the trees and shrubs in Katie's immediate surroundings were kind of wary of her those first couple of confusing years. You know, after the whole turning-into-a-tree thing.

It wasn't until after all the plants had gotten used to her presence did they start to open up and include her. More importantly, they explained why exactly they had given her a rather cold reception in the beginning.

Katie wasn't the first human to be turned into a plant. Nor would she be the last. But the one before her was this crazy environmentalist that tried to start a revolution among the trees and bushes against illegal logging.

At a first glance, you would think that the trees in particular would have been ecstatic to make a stand against people who killed of entire forests for the sake of leaflets of flimsy paper with oddly shaped pieces of metal.

But there were a lot of things wrong with his plan, and nobody liked it.

For one thing, his plan implied and he even said so himself, that cutting down trees legally according to human standards, was ok.

No. No it was not ok. Murder was not ok. Who told him that it was ok?

Maybe Katie didn't really care all that much about the giant brown sticks with green paper-like thingies stuck to the top when she was still a human, but now that she was an actual young tree, the idea of some human cutting her down down right terrified her.

If that ever happened, she would be completely helpless.

No tree liked illegal logging. No tree liked legal logging. They could deal with a couple trees down in order to provide shelter and warmth for various animals including humans, heck, Katie knew some trees that actually want to die that way. For the good of others.

But not even those pure hearted trees wanted to die just so a human could have certain luxuries.

Another issue that the grand plan had, was that they would have to sacrifice the entire eastern portion of the forest.

Never, ever, ever going to happen so long as the forest stays united under the think, ocean blue sky.

When the plant population tried to explain their position to the human-turned-three, he flat out rejected the idea to find a way of sabotage all chopping operations without all of the great risks. His argument was that humans needed wood in order to survive.

Chai, who was a young sapling at the time, pointed out that humans did perfectly fine when they were living in stone buildings. Their lifespans were actually longer before they all decided to move into wooden houses.

The hypocritical environmentalist just said that wood equaled profit and progress in the human world.

A lot of plants were quite happy when that little annoying tree contracted a deadly fungus and died a slow painful death.

That was a long time ago. Like, almost three centuries ago. The plants nowadays weren't alive for that little incident, except for Chai, so all they had to go off of was old legend.

Thank every deity out there that the cold shoulder didn't last for long. It is not in a fellow tree's nature to outcast one of their own.

Unless they are an invasive species.

Or are planning to cause harm to tree-kind.

Or cause harm to anyone living in the forest.

Forest is plant domain.

Trees were going to protect everything and everyone in the forest, if they can help it. Dammit.

But while Katie was on the topic of humans, it would make sense to talk about the kinds of humans that live within the lively forest.

Katie herself wasn't entirely aware of them in the first ten years of her leafy life. Ironically.

It wasn't until some children wandered over to her area, and Chai said:

" _I swear, if those kids accidentally set another oak tree on fire, I am going to scream."_

Katie, who was busy watching over the nest of owls that had settled in one of the nook's of her branches focused her attention on the maple tree that had spoken.

" _Wait, who? Is it that racoon family that accidentally found out how to start a fire with dinosaur shaped rocks?"_

Chai did the tree equivalent of giving the 'are-you-for-real-or-are-you-just-playing-stupid' look.

" _The human kids. Remember, they were your former species."_

Katie's eyes widened and stared at Chai with a dumbfounded expression.

" _There are humans here?"_

" _ohmygod. Yes. there are humans here. Have you been living under a moss patch this whole time?"_

" _I-! ...Nooooo... At least I don't think so."_

Katie could clearly tell at that Chai was now thoroughly annoyed at her when she huffed and muttered something about dim-witted humans.

" _Hey wait! This is the first time I'm hearing about humans actually living in this area!"_ Katie said, in a hurry to explain herself. " _For all I know, humans could have died and it's only green things and tiny critters around."_

Chai snorted loudly, causing some of the grass around her trunk to perk up in surprise. " _I'd tell you do doge but you can't exactly do that, can you?"_

" _What do you mean- OH MY GOD OW!"_ Katie scratched as something heavy slammed into her.

Just like that, Katie's worst nightmare came to life. It started as a small crack in the side of her deep brown bark; a couple slivers of the thick hide splintered off in the impact. Then a spiderweb began to form and spread.

Snap.

Katie howled in pain, but of course her attacker couldn't hear... But that didn't mean no one else could. Unfortunately, anything that was said to her was lost in a blizzard of ashen snowflakes that began to block her general awareness of the world.

Just as sudden as the pain started, it stopped. Katie felt herself growing bigger, and taller at an insanely fast rate.

It felt like she had just downed some kind of instant pain-reliever that actually does its job and gets rid of evil migraines. That though instantly made Katie on edge, but she melted back into bliss as a calm, and reassuring feeling washed over her.

"I can't believe you just did that." A very male, human voice filtered through Katie's subconscious. "How could you make me hurt a poor innocent tree?!"

"Maybe you should marry it." Another person snorted.

It took a minute for Katie to register the fact that, no, these sounds were not being transmitted through the busy buzzy Root Network. Someone was actually speaking them. With mouth and everything.

"Maybe I will!" The first voice said defiantly.

" _Wait... Who's marrying whom?"_ Katie asked groggily.

" _Oh thank all the living things. You're alive."_ Chai breathed a sigh of relief. " _I thought I'd have to find another test subject."_

"... _Seriously. There's a wedding?"_

"SENJU! You already have a wife. I doubt that she would appreciate the fact that you're replacing her with a tree _you_ broke." Katie could just barely make out the fluffy mane of black hair and the blood red eyes of the man who spoke those words of wisdom.

"...You really think that I'd marry a tree? Kami, what would Mito think?"

"I certainly wouldn't put it past you."

The man kneeling beside Katie fixed the black fluff haired dude with a death-bringing glare.

"It's your fault that the tree split in half. You're just lucky that I was here to save it."

The black haired man sputtered. "My fault?! You're the one who didn't dodge my jutsu properly and landed on that thing!"

"Don't call it a thing! It is Nature's gift to the world." The tanner one said with stars shining brightly in his pitch black eyes. Naturally, the fluffy guy's hand was introduced to his face in an extravagant face palm that was fit for a king.

"Do you have to do this _every_ time we spar?"

"No. Not unless a beautiful tree such as this one is involved."

"You think all trees are beautiful."

"Of course they are. They're _trees._ They're made out of wood."

"You and your obsessions with anything wood." Fluff hair muttered under his breath.

"Wood's amazing! There are so many applications-"

"uh-huh"

"- weapons, houses, chopstick, you name it.-"

"yea, that's really interesting."

"-Not to mention the texture when it's polished-"

"Kami, I don't get paid enough for this"

"-beautiful, just beautiful when the leaves change colour-"

"Whatever." The lion like man said as he turned to leave his ranting companion. "Let me know when you're done with this pathetic little hug-fest." With that, he exited the immediate area.

The only remaining man cocked his head to the side, and started in the place where his friend once stood. Then he turned and gave Katie the biggest hug he could muster. Katie was not amused.

"Hi there! I'm a big fan of your work!" He said with a dazzling smile. Katie heard the harsh, distant laughter of Chai, but she was too flustered at the moment to care.

"You know," The starstruck man continued. "Cleaning the air, providing shelter and food for the little animals, impaling my enemies with your sharp, pointy twigs. That kind of stuff." He released his grip on the newly healed tree.

"I gotta go before Madara blows up again." And with that, he suddenly disappeared before Katie could register what had just happened.

" _I have to admit, they've never done_ that _before."_ Chai said, breaking the awkward silence with her inane giggling. " _But then again, they've never broken a tree in this area before today."_

" _I-I-I... What? Did I just see who I think I just saw?"_ Katie asked no one. Some of the wildflowers that grew around her trunk swayed with concern and worry. Chai was absolutely no help in this matter, that useless lump of leaves.

A deadly feeling settled over Katie. She knew where she was now, and she wasn't sure just how she felt about it.

And that kiddies, Senju Hashirama tripped and fell into Katie's arms. Kinda. Sorta. Not really. It was more like he slipped up a bit during a spar with Uchiha Madara and then got launched into a random tree, and effectively snapping it in half.

Katie would forever be grateful to the wood style, utilized by the first Hokage of Konohagakure.

 **Author's Note:**

 **Aaand that's chapter two. Can I just say how blown away I was with the response to the first chapter? You guys just make me want to write this story all day!**

 **Unfortunately, I'm not going to be able to do that now. School is starting this week, so I won't be able to update all that often. Unfortunately. But I'm not going to let that stop me from writing.**

 **Next chapter's going to finally have Naruto in it! Are you excited? Cuz I am.**

 **Like it? Hate it? Have any constructive criticism? Or do you just want to say Hi? Leave a review if possible. I read every single one, and I try to respond to each and everyone of them.**

 **If there are any grammar/spelling/general plot holes, please feel free to let me know. Also, tell me if you think Hashirama and Madara are too OOC, or not to your liking.**

 **Thank you everyone who has left a review/favourite/followed this story. I was really amazed that so many people actually read my work. Every single one of you made me smile.**

 **As usual, I don't own anything except for any OCs that you see in this story.**

 **Until my next update, faithful readers!**


	3. Cherries Vs Nine-Tails

" _It's dead."_

" _No it's not."_

" _Yes it is."_

" _You have no faith in the miracles of mother nature."_

" _That's a myth invented by dim-wits."_

" _It just needs some time."_

" _It's October."_

" _So? He's just a late bloomer."_

" _It should have sprouted in May..."_

" _Ok then, maybe he's just asleep."_

" _He?"_

" _Well, ya. I assume that it's a boy."_

" _I'm pretty sure that this obsession with an acorn, is unhealthy."_

Katie sent waves of irritation in the general direction of her elder companion.

" _I'm not obsessed. I'm an optimist."_

" _...Like I said, unhealthy..."_

On a very normal day, a very normal conversation was carried out between two friends. The older one was concerned about the younger one's mental health, and so she brought the issue up in a very casual way.

By rudely interrupting Katie's rabid ranting about how adorable the little acorn -that was buried beside her by a squirrel nearly five months earlier- was.

Chai a had good reason to worry.

" _The master-squirrel chose me. ME! To take care of this little baby treeling, and I intend to shower him with affection and bacon."_

Do you see what Chai had to deal with everyday? She didn't even know what bacon tasted like.

" _The acorn isn't going to grow. And it's not asleep either."_ Chai said, trying to talk some reason into Katie's less than average mind. " _I know it's hard, but sometimes you just have to let things go. Or else your own world won't turn while the planet does."_

A single thought, a memory of times long past, began to slowly skitter out of deepest and darkest parts of Chai's subconscious. She banished it with a whip-like root before it could reach the light of day in her clockwork mind.

Katie didn't say anything for the longest time, and for once, Chai hoped that the stubborn human (although she could hardly call Katie a human anymore) would finally accept some well worth wisdom and advice.

" _Oh my god."_ The younger of the two finally said in absolute horror and despair. Chai winced internally, but let out a snort of annoyance pass through her roots and into the surrounding soil.

" _See, this is all part of the process-"_

" _HE'S NOT ASLEEP! HE'S IN A COMA! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!"_ And just like that, any hope that Katie would be reasonable in this kind of situation, vaporized.

" _He- It's not alive.. it never was"_ Chai said in a feeble attempt to calm the hyperventilating tree that lived a few feet away from her. " _You're just making it more painful for yourself."_

" _You guys have a shrubby hospital that accepts acorns, right? TELL ME YOU DO!"_

" _Katie! You have been a tree for more than two centuries, I think you know the answer to that question by now."_

" _Nyaaaa! How do you wake up a coma patient? Uhhh, is there a tree version of CPR? I WASN'T TRAINED FOR THIS!"_

" _Since when did you have training for anything?!"_

" _Would you two shut the hell up? It's two in the freaking morning!"_

Thank you Milky. Chai let out a sigh of relief. Had their argument gone for any longer (like it normally does) they might have just maybe accidently caused another species of fruit flies to go extinct.

"Mind your own damn business you stupid magic mushroom!"

And of course, Katie had to go and choose another target for one of her moody outbursts.

" _Stupid?! Why I otta set the nearest termites on you!"_

" _Don't talk to me about termites! I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF A CRISIS."_

" _Girl and boy."_ Chai said in the most uninterested way. " _You are both fabulous, so could you stop ripping out each others theoretical throats out?"_

" _No."_

" _Hell no, she started it!"_

" _...That's what I was afraid of.."_ And so, Chai settled in for a long, long, _looong,_ screaming contest between a Conifer tree, and a Milkcap mushroom.

Yes, this also happens on a regular basis.

Particularly between Milky and Katie. But sometimes Milky picked a fight with Toris, a butterfly that doesn't know the meaning of death. Seriously, that thing has been around for the past five years, and Chai was having doubts about how alive it.

Almost thirty minutes into the epic battle, the first signs that something was very wrong started to appear.

Chai didn't hear the first couple of voices that fluttered with worry through the public communication lines in the Root Network. The second round of whispers were also ignored, since it wasn't that odd for plants to grumble about being woken up in the middle of the night by some kind of brawl.

But once the ground started to shake, and distant yells became close screeches, Chai took notice. Milky and Katie did too, judging by the sudden tension laced quiet that was brought upon soon after a deafening roar pierced through the very fabric of time and space.

" _What. Was that?"_ Milky asked after he collected his bearings

" _I don't know! Why are you asking me?"_ Katie snapped in response.

" _I wasn't_ asking _you, ya whippersnapper. I was asking Chai_ " Milky snarled, focusing the attention on Chai.

Chai wanted to say that she had no idea as to what was going on. She wanted to say that it was nothing to worry about. Most of all, she wanted to say that no one was going to get hurt.

But she couldn't. If she did, that would be lying.

Chai knew exactly would would shake the plant population to the core. She knew exactly what made that sound.

That didn't mean that she had to acknowledge it.

" _I know one thing."_ Chai finally said over the dying screams of various trees in the distance. " _We're in for a shitstorm. "_ All was quiet after she said those words.

The three plants, and their immediate neighbors murmured and quietly asked each other if they knew what was going on. Eventually, Nuttsie, a middle aged oak tree was able to decode the cries of terror and panic.

A tailed beast.

The very thought itself made Chai's train of thought freeze over like a lake in the dead of winter.

The forest was being attacked by a tailed beast. Nuttsie couldn't say how many tails this one had, but it didn't matter. Some of the most poisonous plants in the great forest was already cautiously sending some of their venom over for combat uses.

Any plant that knew how to speak a different language was already explaining the situation to their animal friends. Tigers from that strange training ground where the humans kept genetically modified animals, had already enlisted the giant moles to drill through the barriers to aid the smaller animals who were trapped in the path of the monster.

It was an incredible thing to experience. Natural predators and prey, working together in order to survive. Things like this don't happen often, but when they did, Chai was certain that Katie had never witnessed anything like this on such a large scale.

So imagine Chai's immediate surprise when Katie finally spoke up.

" _I had always wondered what would happen when ten thousand birds started crapping on pedestrians. Complete and total panic."_

It took a moment for Chai to register the younger tree's words.

" _...What does that have to do with anything?"_ Chai hissed. She didn't know whether to be angry at Katie for not taking this threat seriously, or completely and utterly confused.

" _You did say that we're in for a shitstorm."_

" _I didn't mean literally! Haven't you ever head of expressions?!"_

" _Of course I have. I've read the entire Amelia Bedelia series."_

" _Whose..? Never mind, I don't wanna know. Just try to be helpful here."_

" _Righty-o"_

With an annoyed sigh, Chai went back to monitoring the Root Network for any updates. Other than the usual screams and the occasional battle order. But then a cherry tree that lived in the backyard of some human yelled something that stilled all communication for a few measly moments.

" _Something's changed. There's something wrong with the humans."_

Chai was on the case in an instant.

" _What's going on Red?"_ She barked in an authoritarian way.

" _They're more confident now. The Shinobi, they're more confident now."_ Red said breathlessly. " _Why? They're ninjas for life's sake. They should know better than to underestimate an enemy like this!"_ He kept rambling until Chai impatiently interrupted him.

" _That's great and all, but could we get back to the issue at hand?"_

" _Right, right. Got it. I got it, no problem."_ Red said while taking deep breaths of carbon. " _I might not know the Human language all that well-"_

" _Japanese!"_ Katie said, though the long distance line. Chai focused her attention on Katie for a moment, surprised that Katie was even paying any serious attention to the conversation.

Humans were quite ditzy like that.

" _Japanese!"_ Katie said again as if they hadn't heard it the first time. " _Humans have hundreds of different languages. These humans speak Japanese."_

" _-Right, so anyway,"_ Red said before Katie could start up again. " _Something in the human's behavior has changed. Instead of defending their little community to the death, most of them have moved try and corner the nine-tails."_

" _Nine-tails..."_ Chai murmured to herself. She finally knew which one of the beasts were attacking her home. If she had any teeth, they would have been glistening with saliva in the pale moonlight.

" _Oh my-... Oh SWEET mercy!"_

Chai snapped to attention.

" _Report!"_ She hissed. " _What's going on?! Red! Answer!"_

" _...That. Is a big-ass frog."_

A shrill, and nerves laughter sprouted from the confier a few paces away. It grew louder and louder until it was a full out laughter that indicated that Katie's stable mentality had evaporated into nothingness.

" _That's it?"_ Chai asked, slightly dumbfounded. Why on earth was Red, who was in the middle of the danger zone, talking about frogs?

Chai began to ask about the giant frog, but all she got was useless blubbering about how gigantic it was. The only useful information she gleaned from this exchange was that there was a humongous frog at the mountain with four human faces carved into it.

This information wasn't exactly what Chai was hoping to get, but it would have to make due for now. By then, she had abandoned communication with the half crazed Sakura tree, and tried to get a hold of a plant that lived on the carved mountain.

It was no easy feat. For one thing, it was a prime location to see the Kyuubi's movements and where he was heading. And with all things considered, the shrubs up there were being absolutely bombarded by requests and demands.

But Chai was an old tree. She knew how to be calm, and patient in times such as these. That, and she knew how to access private networks, not to mention that she was infamous for trampling over the language barrier between trees and the organisms that dominated the soil.

In no time flat, she was able to get into contact with an Ivy vine that had a perfect view of the battle field.

" _You call me now? WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF A WAR HERE!"_ The screeching voice of Chai's long time friend filled her head, and Chai resisted the urge to chuckle.

As quick as that amused feeling made itself known, it vanished in a screen of thin smoke. Chai once again donned a serious persona, and began grilling the vine for answers.

" _I was informed that there was a giant frog in your general location. Is it any cause for concern?"_

The Ivy vine snorted as a stray boulder from a random shinobi jutsu was hurled in her direction. Good thing that it sailed right over him.

" _The toad is fighting the fox. Other than tramping a ton of plants, he should pose no danger to us. It's one of the human summons."_

That was good news. Really good news.

" _Keep me posted, Alright."_ Chai stated. It wasn't a question. It was an order.

The Ivy vine didn't need to say anything, all she did was send an affirmative gesture. Chai cut the connection and turned to her immediate surroundings.

Chai, and Katie lived in a location that was just inside the grand walls of the community that was built up by the humans. They called it a Village Hidden in the Leaves. Ironic, wasn't it? Thankful, this location was on the opposite side of the village. If the demon fox were to attack them, then it would have to go through the human settlement first. This fact didn't offer any comfort though.

Soon. Soon it will all be over. Chai wasn't going to sugar coat it. She doubted that she was going to live through the night. This was not the first time, nor second time that she had felt even a brush of a tailed beast's power. With the most powerful of them all, the chances of survival was null.

It wasn't so bad. Chai's lived a long life, even for a tree. Obviously, that was not what she was worried about. Her greatest concern at that very moment, was Kaite. For some reason, Katie had been silent for the longest time.

Chai checked Katie over in order to make sure that she hadn't suffered from shock or anything like that. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on who you asked, Katie was alright. But she was completely focused on the small spot on the ground were the unborn oak tree rested.

Katie was probably going to die within the next five or ten minutes, and all she did was stare intently on a barren spot of dirt.

Typical Katie.

Suddenly, it seemed as if the world had stopped. A bright light that was not quite white, but not quite any other colour, flashed in the sky. Was this what it was like to die? It wasn't as climactic as Chai expected it to be. But the serenity of the calm that followed was absolute bliss.

And then came the cheering. Loud, insanely happy cheering.

They had won. The demon had been defeated. There was nothing stopping Chai from yelling out in absolute joy. They were going to live to see the sunrise.

It didn't take too long for Chai to find out how exactly the achieved this victory. A combination of overjoyous grass blades, and the sense of danger free that floated in the air made it very easy to learn everything that needed to be known.

The leader of the humans summoned a god (a god, could you believe it?) and then the god sealed the fox inside a human baby. This in turn took the life of that leader, but the child survived.

Once again, a human had saved the forest from complete destruction. And that saviour was named Uzumaki Naruto.

Chai stilled for a moment when she heard that name. She recognised it. Long long ago, Katie had mentioned that name.

" _Katie. Hey, Katie."_ Chai said amidst the laughter and the happy shouts. " _Katie."_ The conifer tree was still focused on that buried acorn.

" _Chai."_ Katie said with a calm aura that Chai had never before seen utilized by Katie. " _He sprouted."_

Chai knew what Katie was talking about, and resisted the urge to mentally bash her head against the ground. " _Katie, the enemy has been beaten and all you can think about is a seed that will never grow?"_

" _No, Chai, look!"_ Katie said forcefully. Chai decided to entertain her and then glanced down at what should have been an empty space.

Only, it wasn't empty. There, a few meters to the left of Katie, was a little tiny twig with a tiny little bud attached to the very tip. A miracle. Chai couldn't believe what she was seeing.

" _I don't believe it... He really grew? How's he going to su_ _ _rvive the winter?"_ Chai mused out loud, but Katie didn't pay attention to a word she said._

" _I think all that he was lacking was some chakra, something that the Kyuubi provided plenty of."_ Katie said gleefully.

" _We don't know how it's going to affect him though. He must have absorbed an unholy amount of demonic chakra. Trees, especially oak trees aren't meant to take in so much foreign chakra."_

" _Well, we're just going to have to wait and see,_ _aren't we Chai Tea Latte?"_

" _I really wish you would stop calling me that."_

 **Author's Note:**

 **Oh my gosh, this was meant to be posted days ago! I am so sorry that it took so long for me to update and sorry for not answering all the reviews, but I made this chapter a little longer than usual to make up for it. I also made a cover photo of Naruto hugging Katie!**

 **I am amazed at how many people have read and liked this story. I haven't had time to even go on the internet. So imagine my surprise when I log onto my email the other day and find over a hundred emails. O.o Seriously guys, you are so so nice! I never thought that this story would get this much attention!**

 **Thank you everyone who thought to give this story a chance. You may not have favorited it, nor followed it but it still makes me happy to see the view counter go up.**

 **I would like to especially thank everyone who followed/favorited/reviewed this story. You guys make me blush, and literally make me feel like a flower in the spring!**

 **If you guys have any questions, feel free to ask!**

 **Until next time!**


	4. Of Chickens and Ghost Trees

Uzumaki Naruto was on a super secret mission. Just like the super awesome ninjas that kept on hopping on the roof of his apartment. But Naruto's mission was much much _much_ more important than anything mission they take.

Of course he wasn't going to be rescuing a nice princess from the tippy-top of a big tower, or defeat huge dragons with giant teeth. No, he was about to embark on a perilous journey. Naruto was going to spend the night at Dead Hen hill.

The very thought of going anywhere near Dead Hen Hill send shivers up Naruto's spine. However, Naruto was a brave little boy. He was going to complete this mission, because Uzumaki had promised those second year students at the academy.

Two days ago, exactly a week after the very first day of Naruto's very first year of formal education, Naruto approached the group of young boys who had gathered around an empty swing set. The blond six year old steeled his features, and puffed out his chest. With every step he took, he radiated with power.

At least that's what he thought.

Naruto refused to even glance over at the growing crowd of his classmates. All looking at him. All whispering. Some pointing. Some laughing.

Naruto took a deep breath and blocked them out. He only had one target, so what was the point in getting distracted?

"Hey." He said, halting with the fingers of both his hands intertwined with each other. The second years, all five of the, fell silent. Ten eyes focused on the boy with scarred cheeks. Pair by pair, the eyes narrowed into a glare.

Naruto shifted his weight from one foot to the other, all while briefly glancing down at the older boys' feet.

Ten hostile eyes stared, ten sandal clad feet were poised for a fight.

Baby blue eyes snapped back up with renewed determination.

"Uh," Naruto started "I can get that ball down if you want." And then he rose up on his toes and pointed to the star spangled ball that was nestled between branches. When the only response was cold hard glares, Naruto's arm sagged. His head dipped down ever so slightly.

A tall, looming figure suddenly broke through the unnerving stillness and strode over to face Naruto. Said little boy snapped to attention the moment he sensed the movement.

"We don't need help." The tall second year stated firmly. He motioned to a member of his group.

On command, a shorter green haired boy nodded and then tackled the tree in a hug. Then he began climbing up the the tree like a little humanoid spider. The boy managed to climb all of the way up to the little nook, and he knocked the ball down with a single, carefully placed swipe.

Naruto stared up, completely dumbfound. He was completely blown away by the fact that someone could actually climb that high. The tree was soooo big, and the older boy was sooo small in comparison. Naruto figured that the boy would get a long stick or something to get the ball down, but climbing?

Completely unthinkable.

Green kid must have been a monkey disguised as a human.

That was the only possible conclusion.

A low cough interrupted Naruto's spellbound musing. He blinked, and saw the leader of the group staring down at him with a smug grin gracing his features. The green haired kid padded up to the tall one and diligently presented the ball as if it was a prized jewel.

The leader's eyes flickered from the ball to Naruto's slowly reddening face. He stuck his hands on his hips and pressed his ear into his shoulder. His whole face beamed with smug pride, as if he was the one who accomplished that magnificent feat.

"Well… it wasn't that great..." Naruto muttered, trying to stamp out his embarrassed blush.

Stupid stupid stupid! Of course they could get the ball down without his help! They were a whole year older than Naruto, and in a six year old's mind, that was a huge age gap.

Suddenly, Naruto's eyes widened and he perked up immediately."You guys look like you're missing a player! Could I join? I know this great ball game and, and, and-"

The other boy suddenly raised his hand, effectively silencing Naruto.

The smirk on his face remained.

"The War Council needs to meet."

Naruto's head bobbed up and down so fast, he was afraid that it was going to pop off and roll away.

The group of kids, only one year older than Naruto, huddled together in a little circle. Making a point of excluding Naruto, who stood a little ways away, kicking awkwardly at the dirty ground.

The sounds of jeers and taunts floated around Naruto. Slowly, he tilted his head ever so slightly. Just enough to peek over at the crowd of fellow classmates.. The very same people who told Naruto to get lost.

Naruto stuck his little head up into the air and blew a raspberry in their direction, and did a little victory dance. And then turned back to the older group of kids.

"We have decided." The tall guy finally stated after what seemed like eons. Naruto grinned like a maniac. If the kind smiles being shot at him were to go by, then Naruto had finally secured a group of friends.

Now his nasty classmates no longer had any reason to say that Naruto was a friendless freak.

Take that jerky jerks.

"Ah ah ah." The boy said, raising his index finger up in the air and flicked it around as if he was shamming a little toddler. "You have to do something to prove that you're worthy."

Naruto tilted his head to the side, not quite comprehending.

"You need to spend one night at Dead Hen Hill. This Saturday. And you have to bring back a branch from the ghost tree to prove that you actually did it."

Any hopes that Naruto held were instantly crushed by a careening freight train.

"What?!" He exclaimed, stepping back in absolute horror.

"Well, we can't let _everyone_ join the elite Ninja club." The tallest boy of the circle said slowly. A chorus of 'Yeah' went up behind him.

Naruto was silent for a moment. His face was scrunched up in concentration. Finally, he spoke.

"I'll do it. I don't care if I get dragged away by the demon chicken. I am going to do it. That I promise, and I always keep my promises or my name isn't Uzumaki Naru- Ooof!" Naruto's speech was cut off as the ringleader of the group slammed his hand against Naruto's back.

"Great, great, great. We'll meet you back here on Monday." the older boy said while patting Naruto's back in a playful way. "See ya!"

And with that, the group of older kids disappeared into the bushes, just as the bell rang signifying the end of lunch time.

Dead Hen Hill was kind of a scary place. According to the legends that circulated in the top-notch ninja academy, Dead Hen Hill used to be just an ordinary hill with a bunch of trees and plants growing on it. But after the Kyuubi attacked, a weird tree started growing right at the top of the hill.

Its leaves were whiter than the happy clouds that lazed around the sun. Its bark was greyer than the sad clouds who's crying cause a lot of rain. The strange tree looked liked it had snow dumped on it 24/7. And it stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the sea of green shrubbery.

But its appearance wasn't the weirdest thing about that tree. There was a reason why that particular hill was called Dead Hen Hill. A long long time ago, (like three years ago) a couple of genins were practicing their taijutsu moves, when one of them stumbled upon a grotesque seen.

A dead chicken, was laid out on the ground. Right under the albino oak tree. The chicken's head was cut clean off, with various entrails spilling out of its jagged neckline.

The genin weren't afraid, of course. They bravely marched up to their sensei and reported the dead chicken. They were promptly scolded by their sensei for training in an area that wasn't reserved specifically for that purpose.

A few weeks went by before they came back to the same place. This time, they were on a real live shinobi mission. They were supposed to clean up all of the trash that was left behind from a birthday party.

When they got there, all of the paper cups and plates were gone, and so were all of the party decorations. Instead, there was a GIGANTIC pile of beheaded chickens. Only this time, they didn't have any feathers on them.

Instead, the feathers were carefully laid out on the ground to spell out the words:

' _ALL HAIL DARK LORD CHICKY-FACE!'_

And then right underneath it in smaller letters was:

' _go to hell Hikaru, you goddamn cake-stealer'_

When the genins and their sensei read the message, a monstrously big chicken rose from earth and swallowed them whole before they could even blink!

That's it.

That's how the story went.

But the giant chicken demon was still there. Preying on the souls of naughty children who grew too curious for their own good. It was only a matter of time before it struck again.

But if Naruto wanted to have any friends at the ninja academy, he was going to need to spend an entire night underneath the ghost tree that rested on that haunted hill.

So, there he was, two days later on a Friday night.

He stood at the foot of his wore out bed, stroking his chin as if it had a beard and sticking his tongue out. A look of utmost concentration graced his facial features as he debated on what to pack for this important mission.

"Imma take this," He said as he picked up his little froggy backpack that ojiisan gave him for his birthday.

"And this," Naruto smiled as he poured some hot water from a kettle into the old beat up thermos that he had found in a trashcan the day before, specifically for this night.

"Can't forget these!" He cheered with glee as he pushed over ten cups of instant ramen into the abused backpack.

Naruto couldn't even imagine going a whole night without the wonders of ramen. What kind of sane person would willingly go into a scary situation completely ramen-less?

That was like going into battle without a weapon!

At the last minute, Naruto also decided to bring his blanket. He could hide underneath it in case the demon chicken decided to attack him. Besides, blankets were fuzzy wuzzy and were just as essential to survival as ramen was.

With a ridiculous smile plastered on his face, Naruto slammed open his rickety front door and raced down the halls. His worn out boots hitting the floor with loud, echoing thumps. His contagious laughter rang through the air like broken bells.

Halfway to the lobby of the apartment building, Naruto halted in his tracks. A look of absolute horror splashed over his face.

"Chicken-sama…" He whispered under his breath before pivoting on one heel. "I GOT TO DEAL WITH A GIANT CHICKEN DEMON!"

And with that, he stormed back to his room, all while muttering about said demonic chicken.

"How do you get rid of a giant chicken? Arg, if I was a real shinobi I'd probably know." Naruto said as he arrived back at his room. He dropped his backpack onto the group with a satisfying thump and began tearing through all of the cupboards and his closet.

"Chicken, chicken, chicken, NOPE! Nope nope nope. Ah! I thought I threw that out two weeks ago. No, that's not going to help me. Gotta fight a chicken, gotta fight a chicken. There it is, finally!"

After a good thirty minutes of going through his stuff, Naruto finally gathered enough materials to appease the Chickeny monsters, which included but was not limited to:

A rubber chicken (obviously)

Some yarn

Thumbtacks

Tin foil

Chopsticks

Half eaten bento box

A can of pink paint

Glitter

Rice

A wore sandal Naruto found in the dumpster outside his house

A tiger shaped stuffy

And of course, a boat load of rocks

Naruto deemed these materials worthy and loaded them up into a paper bag. Then, he hobbled out the door and was back on the road.

A fantastical daydream about the next morning entered Naruto's optimistic mind.

He imagined that he would fight the deadly chicken, and after presenting the tree branch, _and_ the remains of the dead bird. Those second year students would be so impressed. Then they would just have to let them into their super cool circle of friends, and then they could all become super awesome ninjas together, and kick everyone's ass!

Bam!

Naruto slammed his forehead against the wooden door. The force of the impact caused his head to snap backwards, and his momentum carried him down to the floor. Naruto didn't even have time to process what had happened before his skull cracked against the floor boards.

In an instant, he went limp.

Naruto didn't know how much time had past since he was knocked out, but it took all of his strength not to scream in frustration when he saw that the moon was already high in the sky. He had planned to get to Dead Hen Hill before the sun set, so that he could have some time to set up a secret base of operations, and to get his ramen going.

So much for that plan.

There was absolutely no time to waste. Naruto jumped to his feet and restarted his mad dash to the freedom of the outdoors. He stuck his hand out, and this time, he was careful to actually open the door instead of just running into it head first.

Had Naruto been any less focused on the crooked handle of the door, he would have noticed the quiet splishes and splashes that accompanied his loud stomping.

Had Naruto been paying any attention to his surrounding, he would have realized that he was running through a pool of his own crimson blood.

* * *

Pant. Panting. Panted.

It's a very weird word to describe the process of breathing heavily. But right at that moment, Naruto couldn't have thought up of a better word to describe his physical state.

He was gasping for breath, having just walked all the way to the other side of the village to reach Dead Hen Hill. Cold sweat ran down his face, gluing his spiky blond hair down until it was stuck to his forehead. His arms were shaking from the weight of the various supplies that he had lugged with him.

Naruto dropped all of his supplies and his backpack on the ground. He reached out into the air and with an over dramatic cry of exhaustion, he face planted into the ground.

The sudden cry of thunder caused Naruto to shoot up off of the ground screaming

"I didn't do anything!" Before registered that it was just thunder from an oncoming storm.

Naruto's eyes flickered across the clearing after he calmed down. His eyes rested on a young oak tree with snow white leaves. His breath hitched as he approached the famed ghost tree. Once at the foot of the tree, Naruto stared up at it in wonder.

"You're a lot shorter than I thought you would be." He said rather bluntly. "But you're still really cool."

If Naruto didn't know any better, he would have thought that the albino oak tree was smiling at him, in its own weird way.

"Soooo." Naruto said as he began rocking back and forth on his heels. "Could I borrow a branch?" He asked the tree.

Honestly, Naruto felt a little stupid for actually asking it. It was a tree for crying out loud. It wasn't like it could actually hear Naruto and respond to him.

So Naruto reached up on his tip toes and plucked a small twig off without any fanfare.

Naruto had just completed half of his mission. All that was left to do was spend the rest of the night in this grove. And with that thought, Naruto began unpacking his supplies. He had a lot of work to do if he wanted to make sure that the demon chicken didn't kill him in his sleep.

It took Naruto almost a full hour to set everything up. But when he finished, his reaction stood right smack dab in the middle of the only clearing on Dead Hen Hill.

It was a satanic demon summoning circle.

But Naruto liked to call it a peace offering.

Laid out with utmost care, was a circle with a pentagon outlined with rocks that were painted pink. Within the circle was a tiger plushie that was disfigured by the multiple thumbtack that were stuck into it. The tiger was tied up with a bunch of neon orange yarn. Outside the circle were mini figurines of chickens in various stages of live. Everything from little eggs made out of half decayed rice balls, to full grown chickens made out of chopsticks and glitter, were all frozen in mid gallop.

Finally, at the centerpiece of it all, was the rubber Chicken. It sat on the worn out shoe, as if it were a royal throne. Its beady eyes watched the sacrificed tiger toy below it with a little tin foil crown on its little rubber head.

"Uh…" Naruto began, just as a droplet of water hit his nose. "Giant Chicken-sama?"

His inquiry was rewarded by a flash of white electricity in the distance.

"I hope that you like this." He said, gesturing to his master piece. "See, I know that cats and stuff eat chickens, oh, and foxes too. They all eat chickens, so I figured that you'ld like something that goes the other way around. And ya." Naruto continued, growing increasingly more nervous as time went on.

"Chickens about to sacrifice tiger." He said finally.

Silence, and then a roar of thunder. Naruto gulped.

"I hope that means you like it Chicken-sama."

And with that, Naruto scurried over to his froggy backpack and began brewing ramen. Just as rainstorm began.

The sound of an owl's screech pierced through the unrelenting rain.

Naruto pulled his soaked blanket over his drenched head. Despite the fact that the rain had already soaked through the piece of fabric, it was still better than being completely out in the open. But the blanket could do nothing to stop the nasty cold that sent white shivers down his skeletal spine.

The idea of braving Dead Hen Hill was losing it appeal rather quickly. But Naruto, being the stubborn little creature that he was, refused to back down from the challenge. No matter how cold, how wet, or how many times he had second thoughts, Naruto was going to make it through this ordeal.

A crack of spiderwebbed lightning illuminated the sky with a blinding flash. Dull shadows suddenly sharpened in the sudden light. The loud bang that followed the electrical explosion caused Naruto to run away from his hiding spot in utter fear.

The chicken was coming

Soon

Soon

Soon

Ok, now Naruto was thoroughly freaked out.

Maybe the offering wasn't enough. Maybe the chicken didn't like it and was now going to destroy everything in sight.

Naruto didn't want to be squashed. Or eaten for that matter.

His heart pumping, his head pounding, Naruto ducked under a hoard of stubby green needles. The darkened twigs scratched against his skin, and the dulled needles pressed against him like flies. Naruto paid them no mind.

In record time, Naruto reached the thick trunk of the confer tree. He wrapped his little hands around and pulled himself close. The low hanging branches closed around him, protecting him from the thunderstorm outside of the organic cave. Naruto closed his sky blue eyes, content with the safety that the conifer tree offered him.

Why did he decided that this whole thing was a good idea? Why did he listen to those second year students again? Oh right. The offering of friendship

Stupid friendship. Who needs them?

Through the gaps between the needles, Lightning flashed momentarily. The shadows elongated and spread in a checkered pattern across the six year old's trembling body. A clap of thunder shattered his ear drums.

The storm was right on top of him.

Naruto snapped his right hand against one of ears and pressed his other against the soggy tree bark. His left hand held a portion of bark that jutted out in an all out death grip.

"I'm not scared. Only scaredy cats get scared. And I'm no scaredy cat." Naruto mumbled to himself

"I'm not scared."

"I'm not Scared."

"Not scared."

"...Not scared."

"...Not…"

"...Scared…"

Amazingly, despite the constant downpour and the spontaneous bellows from the skies above, Naruto fell asleep. Still clutching the tree as if his life depended on it.

That peaceful bliss in the middle of a harrowing malstrom did not last for long. Naruto was jolted out of his slumber. He blinked his eyes rapidly, unsure why he was suddenly aroused.

All was silent save for the pitter patters of the rain.

And then, out of seemingly nowhere, a small shockwave of fiery orange and white chakra erupted. It was invisible to both the naked eye, and from the senses of the sharpest chakra sensor. The wave washed over Naruto, leaving only the slightest tingling on the surface of his skin.

But deep within him, a storm of red and blue chakra was brewing.

The dreaded nine tail fox was waking up from his own slumber. The strange mixture of Natural chakra and Demonic chakra brushed against the painted seal that held the Kyuubi at bay. The Nine-tailed demon reached out with his own chakra, ruthlessly curious as to why he could feel his own chakra outside of the damned seal.

The battle between the Nine-tailed giant, and the Seal and Chakra of Naruto was brief, but hard won. With the Kyuubi pushing on one side, and the Natural/Demonic mix on the other, the elaborate Seal was forced to utilised the surrounding human chakra to keep the large fox grounded to its cell.

Naruto didn't even notice the battle that was going on inside his very being.

No. Naruto had more pressing concerns. Namely, the crackly voice that had suddenly flooded his brain. It only said one word. One unrecognizable word. But even Naruto could pick up the sheer desperation that laced that single word as if it was poisoned.

" _Katie!"_

And then everything fell dark.

* * *

The brightness of the morning sun was like the light at the end of the tunnel. Especially after such a brutal thunderstorm. Tall trees were swaying peacefully in the calm winds that followed that dangerous storm. Small woodland creatures crawled out of their little hidey holes, and happily skittered about in the pale pink sunlight. Birds started chirping their usual joyous songs.

Nature didn't stop when silent feet hit the muddy ground. The birds chirped, the animals chatted, and the trees danced as the tall, unidentifiable man with a dog mask appeared out of nowhere.

A dark cloak fluttered in the breeze behind him. Shiny silver armor glistened whenever it caught the sunlight.

Inu scanned the surrounding area until he spotted what he was looking for. Then, without even pausing, he stepped over the remains of what looked to be a bunch of toys and rocks that were battered by the storm.

The ANBU operative crouched down underneath a towering conifer tree, and gently removed a sleeping boy with six whisker-like scars on his cheeks. The sense of faint scent of blood filled Inu's nostrals as he picked the little boy up.

Without saying a word, Inu's form blurred as he bunched up his chakra in his legs and started jumping from tree branch to tree branch. All while never letting go of the precious cargo in his arms.

The Hokage would be pleased to know that they had finally found Naruto.

 **Author's Note:**

 **Oh My God. I am so so sorry that it took so long to upload this chapter. It's been like, what? Two months already? Geeze, I didn't even realise that so much time has gone by. I made it extra long to make up for it though.**

 **I had a hard time writing this chapter. This must have been the seventeenth time that I've rewritten it, and I'm still not entirely sure that I like it. Idk, I've just been having some trouble with writing in general. Specifically my grammar. If anyone spots any grammar mistakes, please tell me. Or any mistake in general. This story has no beta**

 **I am absolutely astonished by all of the positive responses that I'm getting! I really didn't think that anyone would read this story, but now I'm just sitting there going 'Is this real? People actually like my writing?'**

 **Thank you thank you thank you everyone!**

 **If you have any questions or comments, feel free to PM me and I'll try to get to you as quickly as I can.**


	5. Albino Oak Leaf

There was a storm coming. A thunderous disaster that would be worthy of Zeus's temper.

But for the most part, all was quiet. No humans around, no animals, for all of the little woodland creatures and the song birds had scattered to their homes. Whether in a small burrow, a cave, a hole, or a nest, they all left the outside world in favour of the safety of a sheltered home.

Not even the wind was whinding about, it was saving its strength and preparing for the ultimate dance that evening. Nothing truly changed for the sun, it continued to beat down its cancer giving rays, but the gallant puffs of condensed water blocked out the sun's rays. The clouds had more destructive plans in store for the earth below than to simply expose the terrestrial population to illness.

The shrubbery that grew in the thousands on the forest floor was still and quiet, save for a couple of insects that would come buzzing. The trees that scraped against the pale blue sky stood absolutely still. As if they sensed the uneasy that floated in the air like toxic fog.

Suddenly, a peculiar tree with spiny needles rattled in it's place.

Almost as if it had sneezed.

There was no wind, but as one, each and every pinecone that grew off of that conifer tree shook and fell to the ground in a hailstorm of brown. Each pinecone hit the ground with a hollow echo, as if they were popcorn kernels popping in an empty room.

Or perhaps, a better comparison would be that the pinecones poofed off of the tree like and animated cat's hair would poof up after forced into taking a bath. Then the cones spiraled down and landed with a clattery thump against the soft forest floor.

Once the last elaborate seed had fallen, an ominous presences was conveyed across the mysterious Root Network that connected every single plant on the continent.

" _KAAAAIIITTTEEEEEE!"_ Chai yelled, absolutely positively pissed.

" _Hehehe…"_ Katie giggled nervously, if she had any limbs, she would have been rubbing the back of her neck sheepishly. " _I lost my noooodles."_ she said in a small voice, putting extra emphasis on the 'oooo' part.

She prepared to say something once again, but another sneeze erupted before she could get in another word.

" _Katie you are sick."_ Chai said, clenching her teeth. " _Even the friggin caterpillars can tell you that."_

" _No I am not!"_ Katie stated in a childish manner. A cold stare from Chai was Katie's only answer. " _Ok, ok, I'll shut up. Yeesh."_

" _I want you to stop feeding Albie."_ Chai said bluntly. That was definitely not what Katie thought that Cai would say.

" _WHAT?!"_ Katie screeched, causing several neighboring trees to flinch from the volume. " _Sorry!"_ Katie stage whispered immediately after, trying to make amends with the trees who were now sending full forced waves of annoyance her way.

Another sneezing fit broke out, but this one lasted for almost a full minute.

Chai waited patiently while Katie came to grips. " _All I saying is that you need a break. Maybe five days for you to recover from whatever fungus you got. I'll feed Albie myself while you are incapacitated."_

" _Three things wrong with what you just said."_ Katie said through her increasingly prominent headache pains. " _One,"_ She began with her list " _I am not sick. Nopity nope nope nope. Two, I don't have a fungus. It's just the wind."_

" _Of course, blame it on the non-existent wind"_ Chai asked with a roll of her eyes

" _Don't interrupt! Now, number three, Albie-kun is my little baby waybey. MINE! You hear that? Mine Mine minemineminemine MINE!"_

" _Can? Can I say something?"_ A soft, high pitch voice cut off both of the older trees' bickering.

" _No!"_ Twin female voices started simultaneously.

" _Nyaa_!" Katie cried out the moment she realised what she said. " _I'm sorry Albie-Walbie! Mommy didn't mean that!"_ Then Katie gave the little albino oak the tree equivalent of a bear hug. " _Don't listen to anything that Granny Chai says."_

" _Hey! I thought we agreed no name calling!"_

" _She doesn't mean- YACHOO!" Katie sneezed mid sentence, then fell into a fit of throaty coughs. "-to be a meany-."_ Katie gasped out.

" _Katie."_ Chai said drop dead serious. " _You need to stop, or you're going to die."_

Katie fell silent.

A quiet Katie was a dangerous Katie.

Albie, the little angel that he was, chose that moment to speak once again.

" _I don't mind if Grandma gives me food. There. There isn't any need to fight over it. I don't want you to hurt."_

Katie was close to spilling crocodile tears. Then she reached out and gave Albie a huge, hug that was hard enough to choke a bear to death.

" _Curse you, you lazy asshat sun! Why must you let such a lovely little piglet fend for himself?"_ Katie screamed at the top of her lungs. Albie shrunk back, seemingly embarrassed from Katie's sudden outburst.

"Why?" Katie yelled up at the sky, her voice getting lower and more scratchy with every second "WHY SUN? WHY YOU LITTLE SHI-"

" _Quite you."_ Chai Snapped " _No swearing in front of the kid."_

Kaite half sneezed, half coughed and then replied: " _He's a big boy now,"_

Albie huffed in pride, shooting a ridiculously large grin at the two older trees.

" _He's six."_ Chai said

"Your point?" Katie asked, not missing a beat.

" _Six year olds aren't supposed to hear, or say for that matter, swears."_

" _I started swearing when I was but a sapling."_

" _Technically, you were already twenty-four years old then."_

" _Ya, well this is America. FREEDOM OF SPEECH BABY."_

" _Oh you and your made up countries. I hate to break it to you, but you are a little late to use the whole 'This is America' excuse to start spewing swear at every little thing that bugs you."_

" _Oi! I resent that! America is so a real country."_

" _Back to the point. Albie shouldn't be exposed to any cursing"_ Chai gave Katie a long, and icy stare " _Until he is at least thirty years old."_

" _Hey look, a midget."_

" _Right, so it's not good for- wait, what?"_

Katie was right. There, in the distance, was a little speck of yellow climbing up the hill on his hands and knees. On his back was a bright green bag with two large, round eyes stitched on it and a funny little black mouth with a bright pink tongue sticking out of it.

It was practically bulging with whatever was in there.

Maybe rocks.

Probably rocks.

Eh. Who cares.

Point was that there was a little munchkin running their way.

A low rumble of thunder rang through the air, and Katie once again started coughing horrendously. Chai and Albie stood quietly, their attention torn between the sick conifer tree, and the small human child.

After Katie coughed for the twenty second time in a row without coming up for air, the two idling trees were more than a little concerned.

" _Katie? Katie you alright?"_ Albie asked, more than a little panicked. Katie didn't respond with words. Just gasping and hoarse coughs.

" _Don't die on us."_ Chai said, dead serious. In the time it took for Katie's coughing fit too end, Chai had about two heart attacks. Chai didn't even have a heart.

" _You ok?"_ Chai muttered under her breath, her mind already churning through her knowledge of remedies that all of tree-kind had amassed over the endless years. Something was very, very wrong with Katie, no matter how much the eccentric tree denied it.

Katie nodded ever so slightly, as she cleared her throat.

" _ya."_ She said hoarsely, " _I'm good."_ Then she turned to Albie, who was absolutely petrified by the sight of his primary caretaker sudden folly. Katie flushed with absolute guilt.

" _Sweetie-pie I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you worry!"_ Katie cried out desperately trying to soothe the distressed child. The sound of Katie's raspy voice had the opposite effect.

So there they were. Albie panicking over Katie's mysterious illness, Katie panicking over Albie's panicking, and Chai just stood off to the side feeling very excluded.

A clap of thunder followed.

"I didn't do anything!" A sharp voice yelled. Causing two of the three trees to glance up. Katie was preoccupied with the grueling headache had suddenly struck her, so she wasn't able to react to the very human voice that flooded grove.

Chai squinted her eyes. She thought that she recognised that lump of blond hair in front of her. Perhaps it was the whisker-like markings on his cheeks that sparked some sort of memory. But Chai was certain that she would remember someone that would fit that description.

Then it hit her.

Literally.

A bird shit on her and something clicked in her brain.

Chai huffed and then said: " _I swear, this observation is going to sound like something Katie would say…"_

She trailed off as Albie stopped his crying and gave a little " _Huh?_ " The little tree suddenly focused in on his surroundings. He had been so busy worrying about his motherly-figure that he didn't notice the strange child had walked up to him, and was now quietly staring at him.

Albie stared back.

" _You. You remind me of balloons."_ Albie said firmly, and then had to stifle a small giggle.

"You're a lot shorter than I thought you would be." the little boy said. Albie's eyes widened, and then he folded his metaphysical arms and pouted.

" _Rude."_ He muttered under his breath, but he pronounced it in such a way that it sounded as if he had said " _Woode"_

"But you're still really cool." The little blond haired boy continued. At this Albie brightened up instantly, and gave the other boy a cute little smile.

In the background came Katie's muffled yell of "I'm dieing!"

"Shut it!" Chai barked back.

"Soooo." The blonde said as he began shifting around nervously. "Could I borrow a branch?" He asked the tree.

Albie tilted his head a little but noded anyway. " _Don't. Don't know why, but sure."_

Chai, who had been watching the exchange, didn't have the heart to tell Albie that the human couldn't hear him. So, she simply went back to monitoring Katie's vitals.

After picking a branch off of Albie, the blonde walked away and began unpacking his backpack and the sack that he carried with him. The albino watched with great interest as the human boy pulled out various things that seemed to have absolutely no relation to each other.

And then the rubber chicken was brought out.

Chai groaned

Katie coughed

Albie quietly whispered " _Noooo….."_

The goddamn chickens had come back.

Albie had thought that that was all behind him now. But apparently not.

Ever since that crazy merchant had stumbled upon Albie and his snowy white branches, stories had been plaguing the albino ever since.

Did Albie's presence really warrant constant animal sacrifices? Chai and Katie seemed to passionately disagree. But for some reason that human merchant figured that the young tree was a sign of some kind of god, and therefore he _must_ have dead chickens to appease it.

Naturally, stories began to circulate.

So now Albie was a ghost story that was told to human children to keep them in line.

Albie had always felt as if there was some sort of irony about being the subject of a story, but he didn't know why.

But no amount of wishing was going to change the fact that at least once a year, some kid thought that he was being a brave little brat and decided to spend a night on 'Dead Hen Hill' in order to impress his friends.

Katie's words, not Albie's

So Albie watched in silence as the other boy began to do… something.

The Blonde kept on darting from one corner to the next. Dragging around various craft supplies in his arms. He was setting something up, but Albie had no clue as to what it was. But he tried to give helpful comments.

If the human couldn't quite get the glitter to stick to the weird stick things, Albie suggested that he get some more glue. Then the boy would go and get some more glue.

If the blonde haired ruffian was having trouble getting the rocks lined up properly, Albie told him to draw an outline in the dirt with a sick of whatever it was he was creating and then line the rocks on top of it. The boy would do just that after his frustrated expression turned to one of glee.

If the boy couldn't quite decide on how to position the rubber chicken, Albie would consult Katie. Katie would only respond with a pained groan, and before Albie started to have another worry induced panic attack, Chai swiftly reassured him that Katie was just tired and then suggested that having the chicken sit on a throne of some sorts seemed good enough.

Albie, then readily relayed the information to the human.

And the phenomenon continued until there was a giant summoning circle plastered onto the surface of the clearing.

Despite the chickeny theme, Albie was quite proud.

The blonde began to speak out loud. Saying something about a 'Chicken-sama' and he described what he built to no one in particular. Albie couldn't stop the laughter from spilling from his lips.

While Albie was distracted, a pair of adult trees were conversing.

Chai would glance up at Albie, and then snap her eyes back to the human.

" _It's him. Isn't it."_ she muttered under her breath as she watched the blonde prance around his creation.

Katie lifted her metaphorical head off of the metaphorical ground. " _Nyyeee?"_ She asked, completely oblivious to her surroundings.

" _Were you, or were you not the first plant to point out this guy approaching?"_ Chai snapped. A hint of impatience glistening in her eyes.

" _M'tiered…"_

Chai sighed and then said " _The Namikaze er- Uzumaki spawn, or whatever you call him, is literally right in front of you."_

" _KYAAA!"_ Katie yelped, and promptly received a harsh shushing from her friendly neighborhood maple tree. " _Oh My Friggin' God. It's really him."_ Katie started giggling in a very detached way. " _Hehehe… He's really here. hehehe, heh heh. It's finally started. Hahaha Hah Hah HAH HA HAHAHAHA!"_

" _If you're done with you bout of laughter,"_ Chai said careful. When Katie didn't stop, Chai sent out a pin prick or stinging energy her way. A short 'Ow' from Katie was all Chai needed to hear. " _So anyway. What's your game plan genious?"_

" _Oh I don't know."_ Katie said with a careless shrug of her shoulders. A cough burst out of her mouth.

" _Don't know?"_ Chai asked in disbelief.

" _Yup. Don't know."_

" _You've spent the last, what was it again? One, two centuries? Yhea, two centuries preparing for this very moment, and all you could say is that you 'Don't know' what you're going to do now?"_

" _That sounds about right!"_ Katie said cheerfully.

Chai's left eye began to twitch. Violently.

" _THEN WHY THE HELL DID YOU KEEP ON BUGGING ME AT TWO IN THE MORNING WITH ALL OF THOSE STUPID DAYDREAMS ABOUT THE DAY YOU MEET UZUMAKI NARUTO?_ Chai yelled as she blew up in absolute rage. " _YOU LITERALLY DROVE ME TO INSOMNIA!"_

Katie shrank back with her eyes as wide as dinner plate, and with a small frown in the shape of an upside down 'U'

In the very short distance of almost five meters, Albie squeaked as Chai's sudden and rather unexpected outburst reached his ears. Chai glanced up, and in an instant her anger melted away and was replaced by an embarrassed panic.

" _No no no. Nothing's wrong. I'm fine Albie. Grandma's fine, she just got a little over excited. Ya, that's it, I got a little over excited. Oh, and Katie's fine too. Just go back to playing with your new friend, ok?"_ Chai urged, mentally praying that Albie would turn and pretend that nothing happened.

It wouldn't do to have such a, dare she say it, adorable little treeline burst out in tears once more.

Thankfully, Albie turned back to the human. Although now Albie would occasionally shoot a glance at the two adults, just to make sure that nothing potentially apocalyptic happened while he was distracted.

Chai and Katie waited until it looked like Albie was completely enamoured by the enigma known as Uzumaki Naruto.

" _I'm not that annoy-"_

" _I am going to pummel you into next week."_ Chai said flatly. Katie let out a little 'meep' and then yawned.

* * *

When night hit, the storm was already underway.

That was when shit really hit the fan.

The wave of terror hit deep into the night. After Katie had given both Chai and Albie a groggy farewell and passed out. After Chai reassured Albie multiple times that she would keep an eye on Katie as she slept. After Albie fitfully fell asleep.

Chai must have fallen asleep at some point. Which was absolutely ridiculous because she has been spending the past three decades trying not to fall into a unresponsive coma that humans pass off as 'sleep'.

But that was beside the point. Chai was woken up from a sleep that she did not remember falling into, and at first. There was nothing.

At least, nothing out of the ordinary, except for the pouring rain and the fact that the little boy was curled up right at the base of Katie's tree trunk. He must have crawled over there from his shabby little hut he made in less than thirty seconds.

Then, Chai felt something run right thru her. Like a ghost's transparent form had flown through her, making Chai feel like she had been dipped from roots to leaves in a bucket of toffee. Judging by the terrified squeak that was emitted from the direction that the little albino was, it was safe to assume that Albie had also felt whatever it was.

And then a harrowing scream pierced the air at the same time as lightening reached down from the heavens and struck against the earth.

That scream came from Katie.

Chai didn't know what was going on, and Albie's heart was fluttering at an unnaturally fast pace. Terror gripped at both of their hearts as Katie's screams continued.

No matter how many times Chai went through diagnostics, and no matter how hard she tried to expel whatever was causing Katie pain, nothing was working. Added to that, Albie was in a full blown panic attack and was now blubbering nonsense.

" _Katie!"_ Albie screamed out. As if Katie's pain was his own.

And just like that, something within the little albino oak tree snapped. A strange energy, chakra if you will, burst out of within his bark. The tingly orange chakra swept over to Katie and upon contact with the conifer tree, let out an almost silent hiss.

Out of the very tips of Katie's roots, a dark shadow crawled out. Melting away into the soggy soil. Almost as soon as that dark shadow had disappeared well below the surface of the very earth that all living things resided, Katie's terrifying screaming stopped.

Chai didn't even get a chance to grill Katie before soft snores could be heard, echoing through the Root Network. She closed her mouth shut. Perhaps it was better to ask Katie about that little incident in the morning.

The elder maple tree glanced over at Albie, who was also fast asleep. Whatever he did, it seemed to have completely tired him out.

Chai sighed. There was no way she was going to be able to even entertain the idea of sleep. So, she straightened herself up and began scanning her surroundings.

Her family wasn't going to be attacked anymore.

Chai was going to make sure of it.

* * *

" _Katie. You're finally awake."_

" _Urrrgh. I feel like I just got hit by a bulldozer."_

" _You were attacked."_

" _I was?"_

" _Albie fought it off."_

" _D'aww, that's so nice of him."_

" _Do not take this lightly, Katie."_

" _Hey, who's this guy?"_

" _Can we please stick to the issue at hand. A mysterious black object attacked you in the middle of the night!"_

" _We can talk about that as soon as I find out who this little cutie is."_

" _Uzumaki Naruto. Now can we please talk about the attack?"_

" _Who the hell is Uzumaki Naruto?"_

" _...Shit."_

 **Author's Note:**

 **You know, I kind of find it cute that Chai and Katie go out of their way to make sure that Albie is taken care of in their own way, and that their constant arguing won't influence in a bad way.**

 **Just for clarification, Naruto can't hear Albie's suggestions. He just gets this feeling and then goes with whatever his gut is telling him. And since both Albie and Naruto have the nine-tailed fox's chakra in them, the kind of have this telepathy with each other.**

 **I seriously love all of you guys right now. I got 1000 views in the last update! How awesome is that?! Thank you everyone!**

 **If you guys like my story, feel free to leave a review. I always, always read them and end up smiling like an idiot for days on end.**

 **Until the next update.**


	6. The Healing Herb

Uzumaki Naruto was the devil reborn

He was the bane of every hospital worker's existence

That being said, there was even a list of rules and regulations on how to deal with the menace.

 _If a nurse or a doctor doesn't get their paperwork in on time, they will be assigned to the blond boy the next time he passes through the front doors._

 _The seal must be checked over by experts first before anything else is done._

 _Make sure to check if he is unconscious or is just pretending to be_

 _The windows in his room must be bolted shut using a complicated array of seals, and the door must be locked._

 _He is not allowed anywhere near the door knobs of any room in the hospital. Especially his own._

 _Do not mention the ramen incident of February 4th_

 _Do not say the word 'Ramen' anywhere in his presence_

 _If he starts asking about the R word, say that Sora has just eaten the last of it._

 _Sora's current location is confidential_

 _Do not remind him of school work_

 _If the academy is mentioned, be prepared for multiple escape attempts and plenty of insults._

 _Be wary of escape attempts, he has been known to escape even chunins sensors._

 _Do not say anything to antagonise him, or risk finding everything single thing that you own painted neon pink._

 _Use orange sheets, orange clipboards, orange pens, and orange peels in order to please him._

 _Frogs are good too._

 _No R word. This should not even be an option_

 _No medics should stop to listen to any of his stories, for Naruto often ends up blackmailing, guilt tripping, or bribing people in order to escape his confinement._

 _It's best to trust outside sources on how he gained his injuries. Usually he makes up stories about defeating a whole platoon of Iwa shinobi, or battling a vampire and a dragon simultaneously._

 _No matter what he says, he does not have Jerkaphobia_

 _He is not allowed in the breakroom._

 _He is not allowed to have coffee_

 _No pineapples either_

 _And no R word_

 _He must be treated as quickly as possible and then let loose upon the village of Konoha ASAP._

 _He must not stay for longer than he absolutely has to._

 _However, should the hospital workers not treat him properly, they would be fired on the spot._

 _No exceptions_

 _Public execution may follow_

Sasaki Izumi never really understood that list of rules that was pinned to a cork board in the breakroom. When ever she asked about it, everyone would just shake their heads and tell her to move along, and that there was nothing to see there.

They would say that everything will fall into place once she actually gets a chance to treat the child.

Of course only after a firm reminder that those rules must be followed to the letter, and a long, cold stare to make sure that the point got across.

All of this hatred aimed towards the boy and the intense desire amongst the staff to distance themselves from the Uzumaki had led Izumi to believe that the fox had something to do with it.

It was no secret that Uzumaki Naruto carried the nine-tailed demon fox within him.

Amongst the adults at least. Everyone with a head on their shoulders knew not to say anything about the little boy's furry passenger to the children.

But anyone with a head on their shoulders should also know that there was no risk of the Kyuubi breaking out of the seal. The Yondaime Hokage himself took down the beast, and his skillful affinity for fuuinjutsu was known throughout the Elemental Nations.

No one doubted the decised Hokage's work.

Yet everyone seemed to give the Kyuubi container the cold shoulder, and no one would explain it to Izumi.

However, that all changed that Sunday morning.

That very same Sunday morning that Izumi's supervisor declared to be the worst day of their lives.

Only second to the day of the nine-tail's attack.

It started out as an ordinary early morning shift, on an ordinary morning.

Scratch that. It wasn't an ordinary morning. Usually there would have been at least a dozen injured shinobi in the emergency rooms, whether it was for a broken leg, a burnt hand, or a concussion.

That morning there was only a couple of genin who had injured themselves while walking dogs. There were several shinobi in a comatose, but they were being taken care of by other .

Seeing as there was no real life threatening injuries in her division, Izumi's superiors had let her team take a quick break before resuming their work.

Izumi was taking a quick tea break with her co-workers, just chatting amiably about this and that. A couple of laughs here and there, a couple of squeals about this or that.

And then an ANBU materialized in the breakroom, scaring the living daylights out of every staff member in the immediate area.

Once everyone got their heat rates under control, a majority of the medics began to rain hell on the shinobi that dared to almost give everyone a heart attack.

ANBU or not, it's not in anyone's best interest to scare fully fledged medics of Konoha.

The elite shinobi with a porcelain dog mask took the angry screeches and death threats without so much as a flicker of emotion, or recognition of the insults. Instead, he silently held out a bundle in his arms.

For a moment, every medic's face turned blank. Including Izumi's.

There was a little boy who was soaked to the very bone. His hair as yellow as the sun, nose as blue as the moon, and cheeks as pale as the sand of Wind Country.

A sickening silence followed before chaos erupted.

Izumi didn't know if it was normal or not for ANBU to suddenly arrive with a seemingly injured jinchuriki, but based on the flurry of motion and the uncertain shouts from her superiors Izumi assumed that this was in no ways an ordinary occurrence.

At that point, Izumi liked to imagine that she did a heroic deed. That she swooped in with a clear and logical mindset, with orders to the rest of her fellow medics in training on the tip of her tongue.

She knew what to do when a patient arrived unexpectedly. Kami knows how many times they drilled in the procedure into their brains during classes.

And with a couple of glances at the patient, she would be able to correctly diagnose him on the spot. With a sharp wave of her hand, she would call upon a nurse and order her to get this medication, or that medication.

It wouldn't have taken long to get the situation under control. It wouldn't have taken long to get the admiration of her fellow colleagues and her supervisors.

But none of this happened.

None of this happened to Izumi.

Because when she's thrown into a stressful situation without warning, Izumi had the tendency to freeze up.

It took her friend Nanako multiple yells of 'Sasaki, get your ass into gear!' in order for Izumi to escape the sudden blankness that her mind presented.

Izumi couldn't remember anything specific from then on. She was still in shock from the discovery of the unconscious kyuubi container.

The events that transpired all passed in a blur of rushing nurses, screaming doctors. Somewhere in the mix, the dog masked ANBU disappeared as if he was never there.

The medic in training had found herself numbly following orders, and rushing back and forth collecting various medical equipment and gathering up painkillers and other medicines.

She wasn't able to find out exactly what was wrong with the child who lay motionless in the cot that was laid out for him.

Izumi heard phrases hypothermia, severe wounds for a civilian, brain trauma, fractured skull, and the possibility of him entering a comatose, being thrown around. All of which passed over Izumi like a wave of salt water.

At some point, the head medic was able to stabilize the Uzumaki.

All medics in training were then shooed away from the room with a curt smile and a short 'Thank you for your help,' and the door slammed in their faces.

Izumi was left dazed in the hallway. She and several others loitered around outside the door, not really sure what they were supposed to do next after the traumatic event. But before long, the hallway cleared out. Other duties called, and Izumi was left to go off and help hand out food to ailing ninjas and civilians alike.

But a nagging voice echoed in the back of her head as she went from door to door with a cart of plain hospital food.

Uzumaki Naruto's sudden appearance had been Izumi's first big case. Sure she wasn't even an official medic, she was only halfway done with her courses. But it still didn't change the fact that she screwed up completely.

A good medic was supposed to be calm and collected. They should be ready for anything and prepared for the worst. They should be able to handle anything that's thrown their way and come out on top.

She wasn't anything like that. Instead of acting like a medic was supposed to, she floundered and just stood there like a lost little girl the moment things got intense.

And it was all Naruto's fault.

Izumi gave the wooden cart an angry push.

He came when she wasn't ready. If he had gotten injured later on, in maybe a week or so, Izumi would have been prepared. She would have been able to show the world just how capable a medic she was.

Her instructors were planning to have an 'emergency crisis' in three days for the entire apprenticeship program at the hospital. There they would teach the students how to act in a crisis, and if Izumi had gone through that before the Uzumaki came in, then she was certain that she wouldn't have screwed up in the real thing.

Izumi thought that she was beginning to see exactly why all of the hospital workers harbored a certain distaste for the boy.

Izumi blinked and glanced up on the next room number on her list.

It was the Uzumaki's room.

She bit her lip and scrunched up her face as if she had just eaten a whole lemon.

The blonde boy was the last person she wanted to see at the moment, but duty called.

Izumi took a deep breath to calm her raging nerves, steeled her face, turned the door knob and peeked into the room.

He was asleep.

Typical.

But that didn't mean that Izumi was any less relieved.

Quietly, Izumi waltzed around the room and gently placed a tray of food on the bedside table right next to the slumbering boy.

She tried her best to avoid looking at him. After all, she was still angry at him.

Just as she was turning to leave, her eyes couldn't help but stray to his relaxed form. Izumi paused and studied the six year old boy, despite all of the protests in her head.

Naruto looked so peaceful in his sleep. His muscles relaxed, and his chest rose and fell at a slow and steady rate. His hair, which was matted to his forehead when he was brought in, was now dried in fluffy spikes. His round baby-fat face radiated the essence of innocence.

Izumi's heart melted, and all her pent up anger and frustration washed away.

Who on earth could hate a face like that?

That being said, what on earth could have happened to him that landed him in the hospital?

She knew she shouldn't. It was a direct violation of a patient' privacy, in her book. But Izumi couldn't help but cast her gaze to the charts that hung on the end of the cot.

Nervously, she placed one foot in front of the other and made her way over to the innocent clipboard and lifted it up in her hands.

Izumi took one last look around, just to make sure that no one was watching and that the little Uzumaki was still fast asleep, and then she looked down.

She read over all of the information four times. Each time being more confused, horrified, then the last. A morbid curiosity settled over her until, it suddenly hit her like a speeding kuni.

Everything fell into place like missing puzzle pieces being linked together at last.

Uzumaki Naruto was a medical mystery. Plain and simple.

Medics don't like mysteries. They like knowing exactly what's going on, and if there is any ailment, they want to know how to fix it.

So when an enigma like Naruto shows up, they want to study him. They want to know just how his body could heal quicker than a normal ninja. They want to know if it's something in his blood, or if it was something genetic, or if it's due to the fox's influence.

They want to know if they could replicate the phenomenon.

They want to take tests.

They want to know.

Knowledge is everything in the medical field.

Even Izumi could feel the sense of dreaded excitement in the back of her brain.

The urge to understand the mystery that is Uzumaki Naruto.

But she can't.

Neither can anyone else on the hospital staff.

Because Uzumaki Naruto was under the protection of multiple laws, and by the very Hokage himself.

Anyone who tried to take a sample of the boy's blood or bone marrow for the sake of furthering the field of medicine would be punished.

Punished by death.

So if the doctors couldn't have their test subject, the very one that could revolutionize modern medicine as they knew it, then they would distance themselves from him.

The medics would treat the tiny blonde boy as quickly as they could and then shoo him out again. That way, they wouldn't have to spend too much time dwelling about the possibilities.

They wouldn't have much time to dwell about all of the lives that could possibly be saved in the future if they just knew how the demonic chakra of the kyuubi affected the human body.

Izumi stood stunned for a long while. Holding on to the charts with white fists.

She read over the diagnostics one last time.

Then she glanced up at the sleeping boy.

"Oh Naruto-kun." She whispered under her breath. The horrific slipping through her lips without her even realizing it. "How on earth are you still alive?"

 **Author's Note:**

 **I'm sorry once again that this is late. I've had a pretty stressful december and Mid-terms are just around the corner and I feel very sucky about those.**

 **I wanted to break away from the awful cliche that everyone hates Naruto because of the fox. I think that everyone in a ninja village should be aware of the power of seals and based on how much they love the yondaime hokage, they would have no doubts about the abilities of the seal. I think that the medic's reasoning for disliking Naruto is a little more accurate in my opinion than just baseless hate.**

 **I'm very happy that I'm getting a lot of view on this story, especially from overseas. But I've only gotten two reviews in total since the last update. That is kind of discouraging. Don't worry, I won't be holding this story hostage or anything, but I just wish that I could get a little more feedback than that. Reviews are how I know that I'm doing something right, also they make me feel very happy. I understand if you are too shy to review, but please consider even giving me a smiley face if you're just too 'lazy' to review.**

 **One of the reviewers asked if Katie was going to become a tree nymph. (thank you, btw for bringing that up) And the answer to that is no. Although something similar to that might happen in the future!**

 **Until the next update!**


	7. The Great Blossoming

Plop. Plop. Ploppity plop.

The sound of his bright orange galoshes dispersing the water in the muddy puddles that drowned the road, would never cease to entertain Naruto. But on that evening, he felt a sense of detachment from the ripples of murky water in the dirt road.

Naruto was confused. Scared even. And perhaps a little miffed.

He halted at the edge of one particular large pothole that had collected water from the spontaneous rain showers that had happened throughout the day.

Naruto bent his knees, and leaned forward. Gathering up his energy, he leaped off of the ground as if it were a springboard.

A tilde wave of water sharply rose into the air, accompanied by the crack of the surface of the water breaking.

Naruto needed a distraction. His thoughts had been a mess ever since he had left the hospital not an hour earlier. He had already walked two loops around the entire village of Konoha, and no matter how many times

He had woken up with a desperate gasp of air in a strange bed, in a strange room, in a strange place. For a few moments, Naruto had stared at the neatly polished space completely unable to comprehend the situation.

Then the realization had settled in, slowly and steady.

Naruto's eyes drunk in his surroundings. He stared at everything from the chestnut shelf that sat at the opposite side of the room without a single dust bunny dancing on it, to the pastel curtains that were bathed in a minty green colour. A milky white couch with dark grey metal legs stood underneath the tiny square window. Dark creases, and even the occasional rip in the leather fabric indicated it old age.

Baby blue eyes blinked, and Naruto screamed.

What else did anyone expect him to do when he had been kidnapped by bandits? Or maybe it was enemy ninjas. Who really knew?

Naruto had fell asleep under a large conifer tree in the middle of the biggest and baddest storm that had ever descended upon the village of Konohagakure.

And let it be known that Naruto was actually very proud of the fact that he was able to brave such a torrential down pour.

But when Naruto had woken up, he was in an actual bed. With clean sheets, and fluffy pillows stuffed to the brim with plumage, and everything. No one just goes to sleep in one place and then wakes up somewhere completely different.

No. Naruto must have been kidnapped. Why else would anyone move him from his hidey place?

The door swung open, letting in a sea of strange people with white capes draped across their bodies, and funny little white hats on their head that reminded Naruto of origami boats that the teachers would fold during arts and crafts times at the academy.

The mental image of someone working super hard, night and day, on folding tiny sheets of paper to look like little ships for the people in white, only for the creator to find out that all they wanted was to wear it on their heads. Like a little hat.

Naruto would have erupted into giggles in that moment, had he not been aware of the dire situation that he had somehow managed to land himself in.

And right now, Naruto needed to fight off all of the bad guys. Just until a real live shinobi came to save him.

But until that happened, he was on his own. So he battled his kidnappers with all of his might.

Whenever one of the people in white came too close to be safe, Naruto would scream louder and louder.

Whenever someone picked up a something odd like a needle or a metal stick, Naruto would instantly come to the conclusion that it was a torture device from one of those picture books that older academy students would leave open in the library. So Naruto would kick harder and harder.

Whenever a person with an origami boat hat tried to grab his flailing arms, Naruto would bend his fingers until they looked like a cat's claw and rip his hands across the flesh of his adversaries.

Whenever the evil people tried to do something to Naruto that he didn't like, he would pull his lips back in an attempt to look scary.

In all of the stories that the Sensei's at the academy told to the class, the bad guys were super afraid of the hero, so the meanies left the hero alone. If Naruto could be scary like the heroes, then the people with the white robes would leave him alone.

So Naruto snarled and bit down into a random arm so hard that droplets of scarlet red blood dripped onto his tongue, leaving a strong metallic taste for his taste buds to soak up.

And that's when it all stopped.

Naruto's movements began to slow until he felt as if he had been dumped into a pool of molasses. He willed his limbs to work, but they only twitched in a pitiful manner.

He heard the panicked voices of his kidnappers fading away as they yelled about a fox running away.

He saw a faint line of fuzz grow bigger and bigger until the world was just a big blob of greys and whites.

Naruto fought of the lulling call of sleep with sheer will power. They were drugging him, and Naruto didn't like being drugged. It was a very rude thing to do to people.

A wave of nausea hit him. Stars began dancing around in his vision, and before long, Naruto didn't have the strength to continue his crusade against the white coats.

He fell asleep with unidentifiable colours swirling around in his vision, and a soft humming noise whispering in his ears.

When he woke up again, it was to the sad smiling face of the Hokage.

Needless to say, Naruto was so ecstatic to see a familiar face that he nearly knocked down the lamp that sat on the bedside table to the right of him. The old man just chuckled and steadied the lamp with an old, wrinkly hand.

Naruto bounced in place, his happiness clear on his face as he recounted the harrowing tale of how he won the bet with the older kids and spent the night under the ghost tree, and then how he fell asleep under a big tree, and then how he was kidnapped by white ninjas, and then the horrible attack on him when he woke up.

The Hokage nodded along, his attention focused solely on Naruto.

Occasionally, the old man would stop Naruto to ask some questions like, "Did you see anyone else by the ghost tree?"

"No" Naruto had told him. Why on earth would there be anyone other than Naruto?

"Did you remember getting injured at any point?"

Naruto then scrunched his face up in both confusion and concentration. "No." he said as he folded his arms across his chest. "Why does it matter?"

The old man sighed deeply. "We took you to the hospital after... we defeated the kidnappers. The doctors here checked you over" the hokage shifted around in his seat, uneasy. "It turns out that you had a bit of an injury to your head."

"My head?" Naruto asked, tilting his head to the side like an adorable puppy. "What's wrong with it?"

"Well..." The old man started trailing off as he searched for the right words. "You're skull was completely shattered at some point in the night." He finally said.

"Shattered?" Naruto echoed, not really understanding what that meant for him. "You mean broken? Like like, someone smashed apart the puzzle pieces in my head?"

"Something like that." The old man agreed.

Naruto was silent for the most part. He cast his eyes down and stared at no particular part of the bed sheets that covered his leg.

"Weeeell," Naruto said as he brought his fingers up to his chin to scratch an imaginary beard. "I did hit my head a little when I was leaving the apartment building. But it wasn't thaaaaat bad."

"Oh?" The old man perked up "And when did that happen?" The seriousness in his voice made Naruto shiver a little. But it was just Ojiisan. It wasn't like he was going to attack Naruto or something.

Evil white coats, yes. Little blond haired boys, no.

"eh, sometime before sunset. I kinda got knocked out a bit though, and when I woke up the moon was up." Naruto said, trying to act like he didn't really care.

"Are you sure nothing else happened? It very important that you've told me everything."

"Ya ya ya. Nothing happened other than the super cool ghost tree. Oh, and whole kidnapping thing, but that's all over now."

The sandaime hokage gave Naruto a long hard look before turning away to the window, lost in the never ending pit of thoughts.

Naruto let out a little grumble at the shift in attention, but didn't say anything.

Naruto didn't feel like his head was a broken puzzle. He felt just fine. He didn't have a headache, he didn't have a stomach ache, and his neck didn't even hurt from sleeping on the hard ground.

Instantly Naruto's beaming smile returned to his face.

"The nice doctors fixed me up, didn't they?" He said, excitement blossoming in his eyes. "They put all of the puzzle pieces back together and now I'm all better!"

The Hokage stared at Naruto, with his jaws parted ever so slightly.

"So when can I leave?" The little boy asked. "Can I leave now? Huh? Huh? Huh?"

The old man paused for a moment before sagging back into his chair. "I think the medics want to take one last look at you." he said with a small chuckle.

As if by magic, the door opened as soon as the Hokage had finished his sentence. A rather plain looking Chunin stepped into the room. His mousy brown hair was pulled back by a blue bandanna, and his clothing was a muted blue colour underneath his Chunin vest. Under his arms were various scrolls and white boxes with a big red crosses on them.

Naruto tensed up at first, but then relaxed. This was a medic. A real one. He looked like he had come right out of one of Naruto's picture books about some war Konoha fought in a really long time ago.

The blond haired boy with whisker scars on his cheeks smiled, and chirped out a greeting to the approaching medic.

Naruto ended up staying in the hospital for the rest of the day. The medics did a lot of tests on him, and some of them made his stomach upset.

But jiji was there, so there was nothing to worry about. If a medic got too excited about something, or got too aggressive, the old man would stop them with a silent glare.

After what seemed like a bazillion years, the doctors couldn't find anything wrong with Naruto, and so they had no reason to keep him confined in the hospital any longer.

He was properly kicked out at exactly 5:42pm the very same day that he was admitted.

However, before Naruto was even able to leave the lobby, he was intercepted. He was just putting on his brand new orange rainboots that the old man had gifted him as a 'get well soon' present, Naruto felt a slight tap on his shoulder.

On instinct he turned his head around, ready to face the person who had vied for his attention.

"Yesss-~!" Naruto cut himself off with a startled yelp. He stumbled back and ended up landing on his rear end.

A women cladded in a white robe and a white little hat stood towering high above Naruto with an ominous look on her face.

She was one of the kidnappers!

"Hey," She said, her eyes shifting from left to right. "You're Naruto, right?"

"Nyak." Naruto let out a strange noise from the back of his throat. "Go away! You're one of the White-coats!"

The woman tilted her head to the side, clearly not understanding a word that Naruto said. It looked like it was up to Naruto to explain the horrible deeds that people in the white jackets did to him.

"You kidnapped me." He stated with an accusing finger pointing straight at her face.

The woman blinked, then her lips morphed into the shape of an 'O'. Then she lifted her hand up and began rubbing the back of her neck.

"Oh ya..." She muttered under her breath. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid..."

Now it was Naruto's turn to be confused. Wasn't she supposed to be the bad guy? Because at that moment, she was being a pretty lousy villain.

"Anyway. Just thought you would like this." She finally said as she handed Naruto a round orange ball. "And, ah..." She trailed off again. "I'm going to go now."

And with that, the strange woman shuffled off to wherever she was planning on going, leaving Naruto confused, and alone in the empty lobby of the hospital.

Well, not completely alone. There was that one receptionist who was sifting through magazines about gardening, but Naruto didn't really count him.

Naruto glanced down at the orange ball in his hand, and fixed it with a hard look.

It was orange, so it wasn't like the gift was all that bad.

But it could have been a trap.

But it was orange, round and squishy.

Naruto thought about just throwing the bouncy ball in the garbage, and heading off back to his apartment.

He disregarded that thought immediately. Why would he waste a perfectly good toy? Even if it was from an evil meanie who was more of an awkward minion.

So with a smile, he cocked his arm back and slammed the bouncy ball as hard as he could onto the ground.

It didn't bounce.

Instead it landed on the ground with a dull thump, and Naruto stared at it completely dumbfound.

What kind of bouncy ball didn't bounce?

"That's not a ball nimrod. That's an orange." A deep, muscular voice called out from behind him. Naruto turned to see the receptionist had put down his magazine and was now staring at Naruto with an unamused expression on his face.

Naruto's face shifted into that of an annoyed toddler. "I know it's orange, but it's still a crappy bouncy ball!"

The receptionist rolled his eyes in an over dramatic way. "I meant orange as in the fruit." He said as if talking to an actual toddler. "Meaning you peel the skin off, and then you eat it."

Naruto looked back down on the sad little orange that sat on the floor. "Oh..."

The receptionist picked his magazine back up and waved Naruto off. "Shoo. Go wreak havoc somewhere else." The man paused once more when he saw that Naruto hadn't moved. "Go!" he said more forcefully.

Naruto stuck his tongue out and blew a raspberry in the general direction of the incredibly rude man, then swooped down to pick up his orange and raced out the door.

And that's how Naruto ended up jumping over puddles in the streets of Konoha, thinking about his hectic stay at the Konoha Hospital. He had already eaten his orange as if it were an apple, ages ago and had thrown out the peel into an ally way.

Naruto didn't like the crazy people in white hats, but he was grateful to that one weird kidnapper who had given him that orange. After living off of hospital for an entire four hours or so, it was nice to taste something wholesome and fresh. Even if it wasn't ramen.

Naruto halted in mid-step in the middle of the street.

Why was he kidnapped anyway?

"Huh." Naruto said as he glanced up at the sky. Orange and white clouds whisked together in a never ending melting pot called the sky. Blues and purples spiraled around the pink boundary of the glowing yellow sun.

A black horizon stood fuzzy in the background, just barely touching the bottom of the magnificent glowing orb in the vastness of the sky.

The sun was setting, and it was getting late.

Naruto had school tomorrow. He had almost forgotten about that, what with all of the chaos of the day.

He groaned, and let his head sink down.

Well, at least the second year students would let him into their exclusive club.

Naruto smiled at that thought.

Yeah. This wasn't so bad. He bet that the older kids were going to be so impressed with him that they would make him the leader of their group! Naruto had done exactly what they told him to. He went up to Dead Hen Hill, and then he conquered the giant chicken, gotten the branch from the ghost tree, and even got attacked by creepy white enemy nin!

They just had to accept Naruto after hearing his story. And of course, after Naruto presented the branch as proof...

...Oh no...

Naruto's eyes widened in horror.

The branch was still under that confer tree.

He let out a scream of frustration and then kicked the muddy ground as hard as he could.

Now he was never going to be accepted by the older kids if he didn't have any proof that he actually spent the night at the haunted hill.

Unless

Unless Naruto could wake up super early in the morning, go back to the hill and then get a new branch. And the big kids would never have to find out that Naruto had lost the original branch!

It was a perfect plan.

With a firm nod to no one in particular, and an excited yelp of joy, Naruto raced back to his home. He was determined not to screw up when morning comes.

"Hey!" Someone yelled out behind him.

Naruto froze, planted his feet and then twisted his torso around to see what was causing the sudden commotion.

That couldn't have been addressed to him could it?

It's been at least four days since he had last played a prank on the general populous. And what a glorious prank that was. Crudely drawn orange hamsters were painted by yours truly on the roofs of every shop in the shopping district.

Certain people may have been a bit sore over it though. Naruto wouldn't put it past the owner of the butcher shop to exact his revenge by hurling weenier dogs at Naruto.

Naruto's fears, however, were unfounded.

A shinobi with shaggy brown hair stood in the middle of the road with two muscular arms crossed in front of his chest. A jagged scar ran down from the tip of his nose and down to his chin, slicing his mouth in half.

Naruto stood oggling at the sight of the powerful ninja who was no doubt a Jonin at the very least.

This was so cool. This was beyond cool. This was awe-inspiring. This was awesome. This was awesomer than awesome.

But not so awesome for the civilian man that the shinobi was glaring at.

The civilian man started to sway a little, but held his ground and stared right back at the shinobi.

No one dared to move. Not the shopkeepers who were cleaning up their storefronts, not the small children who were playing with a deflated ball, and not the other pedestrians. Everyone was frozen in mid movement. Afraid to even breath.

Then the civilian man broke.

He whipped his arms out and yelled out "KAI!", and a cloud of smoke engulfed him.

The shinobi stood patiently waiting without so much as moving a muscle at the sudden movement. The crowded however, took a collective step back.

"Alright," A high pitched male voice rang out through the steadily disappearing smoke. "I'll admit, I need to work on that."

A young boy, no older than thirteen years old cladded in brown ninja gear stood where the old civilian man once stood. He let out a nervous giggle as he shrank back from the older shinobi.

"HEY! OW! Sensei!" The boy yelped as the scary looking shinobi grabbed hold of his ear and began dragging the younger boy down the street.

"It took me less than two minutes to find you, Takao." The shinobi said in a deep rumbly voice that Naruto thought belonged to a big mean thug, than a noble ninja. "You didn't even bother to hide your trail! And did you really think that I would have been distracted by that poorly placed trap?"

The Jonin-sensei continued to rant about every fault that the struggling Genin had made as they walked farther and farther from Naruto's location.

By that time, the rest of the villagers had returned to their previous occupation. While the incident would make for a great dinner time story, a Genin being chewed out by their sensei wasn't such an uncommon occurrence.

But Naruto was still frozen in place. His mind whirled in shock and confusion.

His first thought was: "I wanna do the smokey-thing that he did!"

The second was a bit more serious than that. Namely, Naruto was more focused on one particular word that the genin had said.

Kai.

Naruto thought he recognized that word from somewhere. And no, he wasn't talking about the lessons from the academy, or anything like that.

Naruto thought that he had heard that word last night, while he was asleep under the confer tree. He could have been wrong, but Naruto was almost certain that he had heard the word 'Kai' at some point in the last twenty-four hours.

Kai. Wasn't that Jutsu used to release Genjutsus?

And Naruto also remembered the word Tie for some reason. As in a bow tie that some adults wore to make them seem all fancy and stuff. But that didn't sound right at all. Why would the word 'Kai' be paired up with 'Tie'?

Kai.

Tie.

Kai Tie.

It made absolutely no sense whatsoever. But that memory sparked by the random exchange between the young boy and his sensei was real. Naruto was certain of it.

Naruto felt his feet start moving in the direction of his apartment building. In no time at all, he had arrived at the front steps of the lobby just as the last slivers of daylight faded away into night. Without a single word, he entered the building and made his way up the stairs.

He could have turned around and ran back to Dead Hen Hill. In fact, every part of Naruto's very being demanded that he go there and search for answers. And that missing branch.

But he didn't stray from his current path.

Besides, Naruto could always go back in the morning.

However when he showed up bright and early at Dead Hen Hill the next day. Naruto wasn't sure what he was doing.

Naruto stood awkwardly amongst the remains of his peace offering to the giant demon chicken. He was going to have to remember to clean up the debris.

Littering was bad according to everyone in the whole entire country.

But other than that, nothing had changed in the short time that Naruto had been away. The trees still stood, the grass still rustled, and the flowers and shrubs swayed towards the sun. The only difference was the fact that there was no constant downpour of heavenly water.

Naruto shook his head and scampered over to the confer tree.

He batted away stray branches as he kneeled down on the mushy earth. He scanned the area before moving on to a different position. On and on he kept looking for the branch that would ensure his acceptance by his peers.

The was no sign of the grey and white tree branch that Naruto had plucked off the ghost tree.

After a good half hour of searching around the base of the confer tree, and then moving on to the maple tree and other trees in the surrounding area, Naruto finally sat back on his heels and admitted defeat.

The branch must have washed away while he was asleep. Or some bird came around and picked it up for a nest.

Or the chicken demon ate it.

But in the end, Naruto was without a stick.

He let out a low huff, and out of the corner of his eyes he glanced up at the ghost tree in all of its albino glory.

Naruto could go up there and pluck off a brand new branch and his classmates would be none the wiser. There was nothing wrong with that plan.

For some reason though, Naruto felt guilty about that.

He has already pulled off one of the oak tree's limb once, and Naruto wasn't sure that he wanted to do it again.

But it wasn't like Naruto had any other choice.

Slowly and hesitantly, Naruto unfolded his legs from underneath him, stood up and walked over to the albino oak tree.

He reached his hand out to snap off the nearest twig when a shockwave suddenly course through him. Like a sharp and painless pin pick to the forehead. The sensation was over before Naruto could even blink.

He stumbled back anyway and positioned his hands to protect his stomach on instinct.

"What?" Naruto asked himself as he uncoiled himself.

He felt another shock wave pass through him, although this time it was a lot less powerful. More like a boop on the nose.

Naruto's head shot up and he swung his head around from side to side, trying to find the source of the short bursts of energy.

For a precious few moments, all was still.

Then it happened again, causing Naruto to jump.

"Alright you bastard!" He yelled as he threw his fists up into the air. "I know you're there!"

As if hearing Naruto, the shockwaves occurred again. But this time they didn't stop.

Naruto was suddenly bombarded by soft bursts of energy flying through his body. It was at that point that Naruto realized that the shockwaves were accompanied by a little humming noise.

No, it wasn't a humming noise. It was more of a beeping sound. Like a little buzzer being pressed at random intervals.

Naruto tried his best to concentrate on the strange noise as he turned in circles trying to pinpoint the source of the shockwaves.

Finally, after an embarrassingly long time, Naruto deduced that the shockwaves and the beeping sound originated from somewhere around the ghost tree. Or in it.

He placed his hands on his ears, and grimaced. "Hey, stop that!"

The shockwaves stopped as soon as the last word left Naruto's mouth.

The blonde boy squinted his eyes and lowered his hands.

"Hold on." He said "Can you hear me?"

A short beep and a small burst of energy greeted him.

"You understand me?"

Another beep.

"uhhh... Not really sure what that means, but I'm going to take that as a yes."

Beep.

"Are you the tree? I mean seriously?"

Beep.

"What does that mean?"

Beep.

"Ok. One beep for yes, two beeps for no."

Beep.

"...Am I a cantaloupe?"

Beep. Beep.

"Ok, so you're not totally hopeless. Anyway, back to the first question. Are you the oak tree that is standing right in front of me?"

Beep.

"Oh this is so awesome! I'm talking to a tree! I'm just like the first Hokage!" Naruto gave the tree a lopsided grin.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto the future Hokage, and don't you forget it!"

 **Author's Note:**

 **I survived mid-terms! YESH! I was going to post this earlier this week however because I already had a lot of it written before hand, but then I added a whole bunch of scenes to it. And pretty much I just gave you guys two chapters in one so you're welcome!**

 **Story time! I was in the middle of my Bio midterm when suddenly my brain started singing this song from the 80s called 'Ne Partez Pas Sans Moi' by Celine Dion (don't ask me why), and I was just like 'Goddammit brain, save it for the French exam!'. And then I made a really weird face. :/**

 **Right, back to the main story. My one concern with this chapter is that Naruto is a little too OOC. Thoughts anyone?**

 **I also haven't really had time to proofread this or anything so if you guys see any grammar errors or spelling errors or just weird words that don't seem to fit in please please please tell me. I want to make sure that reading this story is readable for everyone.**

 **I'm not sure if it's clear, but the people in white are actually the medics at the hospital and Naruto mistake them as kidnappers because this early in his life he hasn't gone to the hospital all too much and so he's not really familiar with the staff. So after calling in the Hokage, the medics devised a plan that the Hokage would be there when Naruto woke up and then send in a staff member who was dressed in a field medic outfit in order to treat Naruto.**

 **(And yes. The medic who approached Naruto later on was Izumi! But that's the last that we are going to see of her for a while.)**

 **Please review if you have the time. I love hearing everyone's reactions to the updates and it helps motivate me to get a chapter done quicker. It doesn't have to be too long (although I do like in depth reviews) but even a little smiley face will make my day!**

 **Also, can anyone explain to me how to get a beta? Because I would really like one**

 **Ok! I hope you all enjoyed reading this lengthy chapter cuz the next one is probably going to be a lot shorter than this.**

 **And that concludes the first official story arch of Unorthodox: Tree-chan.**

 **See you all in the next update!**


	8. Nothing a Maple Can't Handle

_"Alright class, we're going to go over our homework from last night. So if you would please take out your work."_ Chai paused and sent Katie a death defying glare. _"And absolutely no funny business."_

Katie blinked in confusion and then opened her mouth. _"I have no idea what's going on. Weren't we just talking about Llamas?"_

 _"Yes, good catch."_ Chai responded casually. _"Now, what did we say about feeding pigeons spinach?"_

 _"uuuuhhh. Don't?"_

 _"Good. What is the capital of Saskatchewan?"_

 _"Isn't that like, a province in Canada? Does this mean that you admit that Canada is a real place, and not just some magical moose heaven?"_

 _"Wrong! Saskatchewan's a pinata for the illiterate. And Canada is the name of the tiny plastic camel I met almost half a century ago. Oh wasn't he just the sweetest little shithead."_

 _"What is all of this? WHAT IS IT?! Aren't you supposed to be the sane one?"_

 _"Demonstrate how a mozzarella cheese ball sounds like."_

 _"Crinkly boop-boop...? I don't know, It's literally a cheese ball!"_

 _"Eh, it's more like 'Swishy Swish Pop, but that's close enough."_

 _"I don't get anything."_ Katie raged. _"What the hell are we doing?"_

Chai let out a deep deep deep sigh. _"Well no wonder you're not getting anything. Your Kadoodle is missing."_

 _"My what?"_

 _"Kadoodle. You know, the thing that you put in your ears to listen to music. You used to talk about it all the time."_

 _"Kadoodle?"_

 _"Bless you and your barky face."_

 _"Help me."_

 _"Oh there's no need to thank me, I have a fifty dollar fee, plus taxes."_

 _"..."_

 _"Where were we again? Ah yes. Tango lessons."_

 _"..."_

 _"No? Not one for Tango are you? A pity. You know, yoga exercises are great for breaking chopsticks."_

 _"..."_

 _"How about taking a nice cruise somewhere warm. Like the cold, never ending abyss called space-"_

 _"Uh, Grammy?"_ Albie interjected, finally speaking after quietly watching the spectacle.

 _"Yes?"_ Chai asked as she turned her attention away from the now silent conifer tree.

Albie hesitated for a quick moment. _"I think. I think you broke Kaa-san."_ he said as if he couldn't believe the words that were coming out of his mouth.

He then gave Katie a little poke, resulting in a spew of unintelligent gibberish spilling out of the conifer's mouth.

Chai blinked _"So I have."_ She said before turning towards Albie once more. _"Don't worry though, she'll be back to her old self soon enough."_

 _"Why? Why break her though?"_

 _"Honestly, there's no other reason other than I'm tired, a little grumpy, and Katie's been getting on my nerves."_ Chai said with a deep sigh.

Albie tilted his head to the side and widened his already owlish eyes. _"soooo… If I'm ever grumpy and tired I should try to manipulate others to the point where they begin to question reality."_

" _No!"_ Chai yelped in absolute horror." _No. You shouldn't do that. This is just something me and you're… a, mom do together. So don't purposefully try to drive anyone into insanity."_

" _uh huh. No manipulating."_ Albie nodded sagely. " _But why are you so sleepy?"_

 _"I haven't slept in a month because of her, so I had to do something."_

 _"Oh."_ Albie said as if he had just discovered the secrets of the universe. _"That explains the grumpiness then."_

Chai closed her eyes and let out a low grumble escaped her lips. Albie was a dear and all, but sometimes he has a certain obliviousness, just like Katie.

" _I still don't get it. You're always saying that kaa-san needs to keep what little sanity she has."_

Chai snapped open her eyes again and stared down at Albie. _"Because,"_ She said as she raked her brain for a plausible answer that was appropriate for the ears of an innocent tree-child. _"Well, sometimes... um... Oh, hey look! I think I see a roly-poly over there, why don't you go check it out."_

 _"A roly-poly? Where? I wanna see it! Oh, and Naruto's probably gonna wanna see it too!"_

The old maple tree sighed in relief as the albino oak tree's attention shifted away from the current situation at hand.

Living with Katie, and now Albie has certainly been entertaining and exhausting at the same time.

Although the real tipping point for Chai was the Dastardly Day of the Shadows, as she liked to call it. In her head of course. Albie didn't really think much of the incident. How could he? He was just a youngling.

But Katie was convinced that Chai had made the entire incident up just to spite her after the conifer tree caused mass panic over a supposed zombie bird apocalypse caused by a sudden increase of dango production in one of the restaurants in the human village.

Katie's occasional memory loss wasn't helping Chai's case at all.

The shadow bestowed upon the family of tree more than just a sudden paranoia lingering in the back of Chai's head twenty-four/seven, but it also granted Katie blank and blurry spaces in her memories.

And that's where the Uzumaki came in.

Chai had always thought that Katie's obsession for a blonde haired, blue eyed boy with whisker-like scars on his cheeks was more absurd than any other obsession that Katie would happen to pick up over the centuries. Mainly due to the fact that the former human was convinced that she had been dropped into the universe like a self-insert character from one of the many, many fanfictions that she had read as a human teenager.

Whatever that meant.

Chai had never really bothered to listen to all of the insane conifer's ramblings about anime.

But things began to change as the humans became more and more cooperative with each other, and then finally constructing a massive city that stretched on for miles.

Katie would always snort whenever anyone said that the shinobi village around them was 'big'. According to her, Konohagakure was nothing compared to New York City, or some place called Paris.

Be that it may, there was no denying it. After a while, Chai had began spotting similarities between Katie's fictional story of the jinchuriki who contained the nine-tailed beast and the happenings in the village.

It started out small, like the composure of the human's first official leaders. And then a name would be dropped by gossiping plants that Chai found vaguely familiar such as "Hokage," 'Uchiha," "Tsunade," and someone by the name of Hatake who was pronounced all mighty ruler of all stray dogs who resided in the village.

And then the Kyuubi attacked.

It wasn't the first tailed beast that Chai had started. Oh, no. Chai remembered a time we're seeing a Bijuu wandering around was not considered uncommon.

She even remembered the bubbling gossip when the most powerful of the Bijuu was captured by the humans. A feat that no one expected to live to see the day.

But the most recent sighting and capture of the Kyubi almost eight years ago had sent alarm bells ringing in Chai's head.

There was just something so similar between that particular event and Katie's daily rambles.

Chai kept relatively quiet, however. Raising Albie in those first couple of years took priority.

Then came the tiny six year old who was so desperate for friends that he fell for a nasty little trick a couple of his older classmates had devised in order to get rid of him.

Although Chai had to give him some credit. He had a one track mind when something caught his attention. And honestly, Chai had no idea how Naruto was able tap into the Root network in the first place.

But if she had to guess, she would say that it had something to do with the damn demonic chakra of the fox influencing the two boys.

Whatever it was, Naruto and Albie practically ate it up.

After Naruto 'discovered' that trees were indeed sentient beings, he would stop by every day before and after his classes to chat with Albie.

It was a slow process. In the beginning, it was Katie who had to actually translate Naruto's words for Albie since she was the only one in the trio who actually knew Japanese. Katie had told Chai that Japanese was not her native language, but she had taken it in college as a human and so she had a pretty good grasp of it. Especially after studying abroad in Tokyo for six months.

Wherever that was.

But Naruto had no idea what the trees were saying. All he could make out were 'yes' and 'no'.

It was quite frustrating for him whenever he tried to uphold a conversation with Albie fully participating in it. He never gave up though. Slowly but surely, Naruto and Albie began forming understandable words.

For instance. 'Tree' was two quick beeps. 'Shinobi' was three beeps after a short pause after the second. And the name 'Naruto' translated into one long beep.

From there it just snowballed. Naruto began picking up more and more phrases in what would be considered 'Tree language', and Albie learned more and more Japanese with the help of Katie who for once, took something seriously.

And so the language barrier began to close, and soon enough Naruto's own chakra became more attuned to the other similar plant chakra signatures. Before long, Naruto was able to catch what other trees were saying.

Namely, what Katie and Chai were saying.

Meeting Naruto for the first time was when Chai seriously began considering the idea that maybe there was some truth to Katie's stories. A couple of coincidences were alright, and even natural for reality. But at some point coincidences blend into connections, and more often than not, those connections can be sinister.

And now, nearly two years down the line, Chai was living with a semi-amnesic conifer tree because of that strange shadow that had appeared out of nowhere.

But wasn't it rather strange that the only memories that seemed to be permanently missing were the ones that were directly related to the anime called Naruto just as the plot of the anime started to unfold before Chai's very eyes?

No. This was no mere coincidence. Chai was certain of it.

She had just lost a very important resource. One that could predict the future and may very well save the lives of countless plants and animals.

Chai decided that if Katie's memories would come back on their own, she would make them come back. Everyday, bright and early in the morning, Chai would run through a series of exercises with Katie to see if they could force the memories to resurface.

Katie complained of course. Loudly.

But she always ended up complying anyway, mainly because Chai threatened to 'suggest' to a horde of wasps that conifer trees were the best place to build hives.

Chai didn't know much about why any of this had happened. Why that shadow had attacked Katie at her weakest. Or why the hero of Katie's retold story just so happened to be lead to them, and then later he was able to actually communicate with little Albie in a somewhat limited way.

Something bigger was toying with them. As if they were puppets on a string.

Chai didn't like that.

And Katie was completely oblivious to all of it, and kept on insisting that she had never heard of Naruto before finding him curled up underneath her branches. She also recommended for Chai to start seeing a therapist. Ironically.

So as a result, Chai may or may not have occasionally snap, and bark out the randomest things that she could think of in order to get Katie to shut up.

Which brought her back to her current position between one eager albino oak tree who was searching for a non-existent insect and a freaked out conifer tree whose brain was fizzling out.

Chai snorted.

It seemed like today would be a slow day, even with all things considered.

 _"Hey! Hey look! It's Naruto!"_ Albie Bubbled.

 _"OH MY GOSH, IT'S BABY CINNIMONROLL NUMBER TWO!"_ Katie yelled out at the sound of Naruto's name being spoken, and effectively breaking away from her shock induced trance

Looks like Chai spoke too soon.

She looked out to see a figure walking up a familiar path. It got closer and closer until Chai was able to make out the trademark head of spiky blond hair, and a white shirt with a red swirl-like raindrop printed on it.

Naruto trudged over to the trio of tree before halting and letting his backpack drop to the ground with a solid thump. Then he slowly knelt down on his knees and stared at nothing in particular with a very tense expression on his face.

And he promptly fell forward, getting a face full of dirt.

Naruto didn't get up though, and instead bunched up his chakra before releasing it into the ground in a very specific code.

 _"I'm dead."_ Naruto groaned.

 _"So. So school was not good."_ Albie said sympathetically.

" _I failed my history test. Really badly."_

 _"Oooooohhhhh!"_ Katie cooed. _"It's ok. Everything's going to be ok. We're just going to try even harder next time. How about we all go to McDonalds and eat fatty foods to ease all of our pain. I could really go for some McNuggets right about now."_

Chai rolled her eyes in an over exaggerated way, while Naruto glanced up at the trees surrounding him with a small lopsided smile.

"Thanks Albie-kun. Thanks Tree-chan." He said out loud before pushing his upper body off of the ground and then crawled over to the the grayish-white tree and leaned back against the trunk.

 _"I studied really really hard for this history test though and I still failed."_ Naruto huffed, although this time speaking to the trees through chakra bursts.

 _"Do you have a copy of the test? Or the test itself? Maybe I could go over it and see what went wrong."_ Chai offered. _"Katie and I have pretty much lived through the entire founding of Konohagakure."_

Naruto shook his head in distress. _"No, they never hand back the tests."_

Katie gave Naruto a sideways glance. _"Huh. WELLLLL, you know, back in MY day, our teachers would always hand our tests back and then sometimes they would force us to retake it if we got a bad grade."_ She paused. _"Wait. That's good. Retaking the tests usually helped me get my grade up."_

Albie and Naruto simultaneously blinked.

 _"Why don't your teachers ever give you back your tests and quizzes? Like, how are you get smarter and stuff in school if you don't learn from mistakes?"_ Katie asked. _"That's bad teacher skills right there. Did your teachers give you any extra work to make it up? Or like tutoring or something?"_

Naruto shook his head once more.

 _"Are you kidding me?! Nyyyeeeeeeee, where on this tiny tiny planet did they get their teaching degree?"_

 _"Well, they are shinobi. So they got to know what they're doing. Shinobi's always know what's right and wrong."_ Naruto spoke up in defense of his sensei's. Even though Naruto never really liked his sensei's, they were still Shinobi and Naruto practically worshiped the ground where ninjas stood.

Katie opened up her mouth really wide, and inhaled loudly.

Chai saw this as a sign that Katie was about to embark on another one of her hyperventilating rambles, and so the maple tree coughed and cleared her throat.

 _"How about we move on to some more light hearted topics."_ Chai said with a slight inclination of her head.

 _"Oh! Oh! I found a cool looking rock!"_ Albie volunteered with his arm waving wildly in the air and his eyes sparkled in excitement.

 _"Really? Where?"_ Naruto asked, his sub par test scores completely forgotten.

 _"Yeah! It's shaped like a baby duckling."_ Albie added. _"Someone was passing by this morning while you were at school and then they kicked it over by accident. And then I saw it just sitting there over by that pile of leaves. Come on, it's over there!"_

Katie grinned and tilted her head in admiration as Naruto scuttled up to his feet to see the rock for himself.

 _"Look at our two little boys."_ She hummed. _"They're growing up so fast."_

Chai raised an eyebrow. _" I hope you're not trying to imply that we are in a romantic relationship, because I assure you that we are most certainly not."_

Katie let out a loud, pig-like snort.

 _"Course not. I can't imagine ever dating a stuffy faced tree like you."_

 _"Good, because I can't imagine ever dating someone who repeatedly mistakes shuriken for food."_

 _"Hey, I don't actually eat them. I physically cannot do that"_

 _"The last time some poor sod dropped their little ninja stars you were freaking out because you thought that it was pizza."_

 _"Pizza is a perfectly good reason to freak out. It's literally been like three centuries since I last had some pizza."_

 _"I do not see the appeal of a piece of bread with tomatoes smeared on it and a bit of cheese shreds sprinkled on top."_

 _"It's good stuff."_

 _"It sounds like a demented pie."_

 _"You take that back!"_

 _"I can't believe that we are even having this conversation in the first place."_

 _"I can't believe that you would compare pizza with pie! Pie sucks, pizza rules."_

 _"And if you don't shut up right now, I'm gonna break your mushy brain again."_

Katie clamped her mouth shut with a click.

Chai sighed. _"Thank you."_ Then she turned her gaze at the two young boys who were too busy discussing the pros and cons of starting a rock collection to notice Chai and Katie's verbal spar.

 _"They are cute though. You have to admit that."_ Katie said quietly.

 _"I suppose so."_ Chai answered as dismissively as she could.

She watched as Naruto fumbled around with a small smooth rock in his hand, eager to make out the duck-like shape that Albie said he had seen in it. He let out a frustrated yell, and Albie was quick to console him. After a few more moments Naruto let out a victory cry and held up the rock up against the sky as Albie cheered.

At that moment, Chai felt a wave of pride wash over her.

Because Chai may not know what the future holds for them, but she could say right now that things did not look so bad.

Yeah, things were going to be alright.

 **Author's Note:**

 **GUESS WHO JUST GOT THEIR BRACES OFF! THAT'S RIGHT, THIS GIRL!**

 **Ok, back to the A/N.**

 **I think I'm getting better at updating this story regularly. There had been an update for every week this past month, and I'm pretty proud of that.**

 **Thank you so so much, you fabulous reviewers! You guys gave me some serious motivation to get this chapter complete. Hopefully you guys liked this chapter, because I kind of think this was more of a filler chapter. But I wanted to make sure everyone knew that Katie was alright after hearing about everyone's concerns for her ^.^.**

 **And yes, Naruto calls Katie 'Tree-Chan'. Hence the title of this story.**

 **I just realized that I haven't written anything from Katie's POV in a really long time, so the next chapter is going to be in her's.**

 **Just for my own curiosity, who is your favorite character so far in this story? Mine is going to have to be Chai because she's the one who keeps everyone grounded, and although she's kind of snappy at times and acts like a big grump, she care deeply for the people in her life and wants to protect them no matter what.**

 **So, feel free to let me know how you liked this chapter and let me know if there is anything I should improve on, or if you guys have any suggestions for future chapters. Also please tell me if I have any spelling or grammar errors that I should fix.**

 **And remember to leave a review. Even a smiley face will do! (oh, that rhymed)**

 **Until the next update**


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